Cox Clan

Lovin' my beautiful kids right now.

2011-01-04T15:29:00.000-08:00

I was just looking at a picture of the kids and noticing that my girls are beautiful and my boys are way cool! Just wanted to share that bit of information with everyone. I love my kids a ton and I sure hope that they had a great Christmas/New Year break and are enjoying being back at school.

December starts with a BANG

2010-12-09T21:28:00.000-08:00

Traditionally we have our "Christmas Kick-off Day" the day right after Thanksgiving. This year we were in Utah so we had to come up with a different day. So, we decided to do it on the 1st Saturday in December. Friday night was spent putting up the Christmas tree (it's fake so David and I had to put all the branches in), stringing the lights and making the cinnamon rolls for breakfast the next morning. David ran out and got us some dinner from a restaurant. We ate, put the kids to bed and started in on all the prep work for the next morning. Then around 10 we headed to bed.

At 3:10am I woke up with the worst stomach pain EVER!! Oh it was awful. It was followed by numerous bouts of vomiting and diarrhea and painful stomach cramps. We were up for an hour, my sweet husband gave me a Priesthood Blessing and then sat up with me. At 4:15ish I was finally able to go back to sleep. Shortly thereafter David was woken up by our boy Nephi and they went out and slept on the couch. Nephi was so excited about the Christmas tree. David said when he flipped the switch and turned the lights on, Nephi's eyes grew really big and he was so happy and excited! Cool!! I stayed in bed all of Saturday morning still having episodes of vomiting and diarrhea and trying, when the pain would let up, to get some sleep. David, the great father that he is, cooked the cinnamon rolls according to my instructions and made the frosting - both of which he had never done before. I was grateful and the kids said they turned out wonderfully. They then set up all the Christmas decorations and, after waiting as long as they could for me to join them, went ahead without me and decorated the Christmas tree. I was still miserable in bed.

Occasionally I will get sick and be in bed for a while, but it usually only for a few hours and then it passes. This time it wasn't getting any better and in fact seemed to be getting worse. Around 2:15pm I had a deep impression that I should go to the ER. I immediately called for David and told him he needed to get me an ambulance because there was no way I could make it out to the car - I was so weak. He called 911 and then went out to warn the kids that the ambulance was coming to take me to the doctor, but that I would be okay and there was no reason for them to worry. The paramedics came and whisked me away - off to Kaiser we went. David loaded the kids in the car and went to pick up Eve, his mom that lives nearby, and then dropped them all off at home and hurried over to the hospital. My parents were also in route.

When I got there and they hooked me up to the monitors the nurses started becoming concerned. Apparently my heart rate was down to 32 beats per minute - not a good thing. My heart was also in a weird rhythm they referred to as By-jimineys. That means instead of a regular beat it was going really fast and then would stop or slow down in an erratic fashion. In fact, they told us after ward that they had a crash cart right outside the room for me. In came 3 nurses and 1 doctor and they administered Atropine (I think that's what they called it) to jump start my heart. It worked and I started feeling much better. They ran multiple EKGs and did some X-Rays. We realized how serious it was when they started to ask in a round about sort of way if I had a DNR.

They then decided it best for me to remain in the hospital so I was admitted. Over the course of the next few days they gave me various different drugs and I continued to improve. By Monday I felt like a whole different person and they let me come home on Tuesday. I was so excited to see my kids and they sure seem happy and relieved to see me. Huge thanks go out to my sister, Jenn, for coming to sit with me most of the day on Monday so I didn't have to be alone. Also to my parents for hanging out with me until I was admitted and then my mom coming to the hospital on Sunday and staying with me for a long time. I am so grateful to my wonderful husband. This was probably the worst time for this to happen as he is in the middle of studying for finals - but he has been so great and has ALWAYS put me first and has been doing great with the kids. Thanks to Eve for spending the weekend at my house so that David could come and go as he needed and could visit me whenever he could. And finally a huge thanks to all of you for your prayers and happy thoughts. I couldn't make it through this without you.

So now I am home and am still recovering. I have to make sure to sit down and rest regularly. My body is slowly gaining strength - very slowly. I am so grateful that we called the ambulance when we did - they suggested that if we would have waited things could be much worse. I am sure that I was inspired to call for the ambulance and thank my Heavenly Father for his healing power. I know that my time is limited, or might be by this disease that I have, but I am not going down without a fight and it seems as though God is on my side in this fight - so I think I am here for a long time to come.

I came home to a very wonderfully decorated house and I am so excited to celebrate this Christmas season. I am thankful for my Savior and I love celebrating his birth. This is my favorite time of year! I hope that you all have a joyous holiday season. Merry Christmas!!!

End of November

2010-12-09T21:04:00.000-08:00

The week before Thanksgiving I took Faith and Hyrum to see the new Harry Potter movie - the midnight premiere of course!! We went with my parents and met up with my brother, Jarrod and 3 of his boys. It was a blast. Before we went in I was waiting in the car because it was so cold and my parents were waiting in line with the kids. After a few minutes of waiting in the freezing cold, my mom took the kids up to the lobby and asked if we could wait inside due to the fact that I had cancer and the cold is hard for me. They were very nice and said that we could. When they came back to the car to get me, Hyrum said, "Man! Cancer Rocks!!" with as much enthusiasm as a child could muster. I turned to him and said - "Hyrum! It doesn't rock, but there are occasional perks." He immediately agreed with me. It was hilarious!!

The day before Thanksgiving, we loaded a rental car (a beautiful black Suburban) with tons of stuff and headed East for Alpine, Utah. We only had 4 stops, but with crazy traffic it took us 15 hours to get there. We arrived on Thanksgiving morning at 1:30am. We had a fantastic visit with David's family and then on Saturday with my family. The only thing we didn't do - and now I'm kicking myself - is that we didn't get any group pictures! UGH!!! Oh well. We did get this great family picture on Friday afternoon when we took the kids into Salt Lake City and walked around Temple Square.

On Sunday after church the kids and David got all dressed in David's Mom's extra snow clothes and went outside and played in the snow. They thought it was so fun and some of them were out there for hours.

We headed home on Monday morning and it took us only 2 stops and 11 hours later we were home! We had a great vacation and I just want to make sure all who helped us get there and/or planned things so that we could see everyone know how much I really appreciate all you did! It was a great trip and we couldn't have done it without The Dream Foundation, our Mission Family and other friends and family. Thanks for making our family's Thanksgiving Day the best it could have been!!

Not much happening

2010-11-21T16:17:00.000-08:00

We have had a pretty uneventful month! Which is wonderful. As I look back over the calendar though, I think more happened than I realized!

I had 2 doctor appointments. One with my oncologist and one with my radiology oncologist. Both had similar outcomes. The scans that I had at the end of October and beginning of September show that my cancer is stable. Good news, huh? The bad part? There is nothing they can do right now. I guess that it is not so bad. I really don't want to have chemotherapy - it causes such lousy side effects and I just don't like spending my time there. So, we just wait and pray for the best. We exercise the two things I am not so good at lately: patience and faith/trust in God.

For those of you who know me, you know that I am by far NOT the most patient person you will ever meet. I also like to do things on my own. This is my trial. So I push forward and practice patience with the Lord and this stupid cancer while learning better to trust God and have faith and confidence in Him. What a struggle this is becoming for me. You would think that as this experience goes on, I would get better, but I feel that I am falling behind. It is easy to get complacent. It is easy to forget on a daily basis to turn to the Lord. Instead I find myself only looking to Him when I need some relief from the pain or aches. I need to break this habit NOW!! It is vital to my eternal progression. It doesn't matter in the long run what my kids get this Christmas if I am not there in the Eternities with them. I have to keep reminding myself of this. It is so important!

As for everything else, things are going well. The kids are now on Thanksgiving break and loving it. We are planning on leaving for Utah on Wednesday, early in the morning, and driving across Nevada to visit David's family and some of mine as well. The kids are counting down the days until we leave. They are so excited to see their Grandparents and Aunts, Uncles and Cousins. I hope the drive won't be too difficult for us all. We did all survive the trip to Disneyland in March, so hopefully that is a good indicator that this will go well.

This Christmas will be a busy one. We have 3 concerts in 2 nights the week before Christmas - not quite sure how we are gonna pull that one off. We also have many school festivities and reports due. David and I have finals and then some much need time off! So things are filling up on our calendars but in a good way and we are excited to celebrate this joyous time of year. I love Christmas and have already started playing some Christmas music here and there.

We hope that everyone enjoys their holidays beginning with a Happy Thanksgiving!! I know that I have TONS to be grateful for!!

Happy Halloween

2010-10-29T10:01:00.001-07:00

Very Quick Health Update

2010-10-20T18:33:00.000-07:00

Just wanted to let everyone know that we discovered today that I can't take the new experimental drug. It would cause problems with my pain medicine and there is no other pain medication that they can give me. We are still optimistic and I am counting on your prayers, my body fighting and blessings from heaven to get us through this. I have confidence in the Lord that if it is his will, my life will be preserved. Please continue to pray that I might have a full recovery. Remember that He knows what is best for me, my husband, my kids, my parents (all of them) and all of my extended family and friends. My life is fully in His hands.

I am a lot disappointed, but I have to rely on my faith now and I will. I am so grateful for what I know and my faith in God. Thanks again for all your prayers - keep 'em comin'!!

Quick Health Update

2010-10-19T22:38:00.000-07:00

I saw the oncologist yesterday (Monday). After reviewing my bloodwork it has been determined that I am no longer a candidate for chemotherapy. Basically - Chemo suppresses your bone marrow, as does radiation. My bone marrow has been so suppressed that it is not rebuilding itself. If I continue to do chemo it will just make me weaker and sicker and destroy, or at least dramatically impact, my quality of life. So, no more chemo!! YAY for me!! I am so thrilled. I am also a little concerned about what that means for my cancer, but I am grateful that I don't have to go through the side-effects of chemo again.

My doctor said that if we were seeing another doctor they might just say that they would send me to hospice and from what I understand of that, it's their way of saying - "Sorry, nothing more we can do for you." But my doctor has noticed that my body is fighting this cancer and that I am not showing all the symptoms/signs of some one who is as "sick" as I am. This gives him hope and so he is willing to try a very experimental treatment. This is so experimental that they are not even in clinical testing yet and in fact it is just a theory backed by one study of a doctor that shows promise. The treatment is that I take an extremely low dose of a certain drug that is usually used to help drug addicts get over their addictions. The size dose is about 10% of the traditional dose. I am not 100% sure that we are going this route, but it does sound promising and I don't have anything to lose - there are no side effects. I will be researching this over the next few days and probably start with it next week. We shall see.

Other than that, things here are going well. We are doing lots of homework, cleaning house, making dinner, running errands and just the everyday goings on for a Mom. Halloween is almost upon us and I think I am almost done with the costumes!! So excited!!

Hope all is well with you all. We love you and appreciate your prayers and kind thoughts in our behalf. Enjoy the remainder of your week, we will - with all our activities planned how could we not?!?!

Grumpy - Grateful

2010-10-17T14:48:00.000-07:00

Lately I haven't felt the best so I have been a little grumpy. I think it was Friday night that I looked at Gloria and Nephi and just felt a wave of gratitude wash over me. Yesterday was the school carnival. We went and again as I watched all of my kids playing the games or hangin' with their friends and my wonderful husband helping the 2 little ones (who aren't so little these days), I again felt that gratitude. So, rather than post all the goings on around here for the past few weeks, I decided that I wanted to post what I am grateful for. Here goes:

My loving Father in Heaven and his son Jesus Christ

My wonderful, loving, helpful husband

My beautiful, energetic children

My delightful and very helpful parents

My extended family and their prayers on my behalf

My friends and their concern for me

A warm home that fits us all

A soft bed to lay on when I feel crummy or am just ready for a good night sleep

A car that fits us all and gets us where we need to go

The bus for bringing David home from school some days

The gospel

The scriptures for teaching me of the Lord

The sun

The rain

The clouds

The beautiful trees and flowers

Umbrellas

Clothes

Shoes

Having plenty of food and even more treats

Store bought sugar cookies with frosting - you know the ones

A good school for my kids to go to

The opportunity for me to go back to school

Hearing Aids

Being crafty

My camera

Time

My health - I know I have cancer - but it could be worse

Pain medicine

Doctors

VIP week in Kindergarten

Star week in 3rd grade

Smiles

Hugs

Kisses from my kids

The United States of America

Memories

The ability to read and write

Music

My husband's beautiful voice

A clean house

Just for Kids (an organization that provides activities for families with cancer)

Sutter Cancer Center's CATS program

Panda Express (yummy spring rolls!!)

Chipotle (love their chicken tacos)

Sees Candy

Pictures

Disneyland

Rollercoaster Rides

Animals (just not at my house)

Sewing

Dates with my husband

Quiet times

Peaceful feelings

Happy thoughts

People that read my blog :)

People that make comments on my blog :)

A Dishwasher

Washers and Dryers for my clothes

Toilets that flush

Running water in my house

A place for my kids to play right outside

Parks

Learning

and the list goes on...

I hope you can take some time today or in the future to just think about what you're grateful for. I know that what I am grateful for far out weighs what I don't care for. Thinking about these things and writing them all down gives me a bit of perspective, kind of like a pro/con list. I have so many things to be grateful for.

I had blood work done today and it came back very close to the same as last time I got it done a month ago. Tomorrow I will meet with my doctor and find out exactly what that means - I am thinking that chemo is a no-go again. In fact, based on my very limited knowledge and understanding, I believe that I am no longer a chemo candidate. My bone marrow has become too suppressed. We shall find out tomorrow and I will pass on any news here.

Enjoy your Sabbath Day. Remember to be grateful. Tell whom you love that you love them and give hugs. All things considered I am doing well and I love my life. Have a happy day!

A month?

2010-09-12T15:23:00.000-07:00

Wow!! Time sure flies when you are having fun - and we have been having lots of fun! Let's see if I can get you caught up with our busy lives. On August 20th the girls were in a great play put on by the Arden Players Club. They both had speaking parts and singing and dancing parts. It was really a cute show and they had a fun time over the summer going to practice 2 - 4 days per week and learning a lot of music from the 70s and 80s.

The 23rd of August was the first day of school and the wonderfully forgetful mom that I am forgot all about taking pictures. So you will just have to believe me when I say they were the cutest 6th grader, 5th grader, 3rd grader, 1st grader and Kindergartener that I know!

They had a great 1st day and now it has been a few weeks and they are still enjoying going to school!

August 27th I took Vilate on a date to the mall to get her ears pierced! She was so funny walking around the store trying to decide if she was brave enough. She was so nervous that it was going to hurt and she hates to get hurt. After about 20 minutes of coaching from me and the lady who worked there, she decided that she could handle it. She held on so tight to that teddybear and my hand for the first ear, but then once she realized that it didn't really hurt, she did the other ear on her own! Way to go Vilate!!

Faith is my big 6th grader this year and is loving it! The 6th graders at our school have the privilege of having one of the teachers being a guitar fan. Mr. Martin has, for years, taught those 6th graders with a desire to learn, how to play the guitar. Faith was so excited and her Dad took her to a couple of music stores where they located the perfect guitar for her. She is supposed to bring her guitar to school on Fridays for class, but she brings her guitar everyday so that she can play during recess and after lunch. She is constantly cleaning the house up so that she can have some guitar time. So far she has learned: Mary had a Little Lamb, some of Jingle Bells, some of Smoke on the Water and some other parts of songs. She is loving it!!

Let's see what else have we done? We went to the Chili-Cookoff/Pie-Bakeoff at the church a few weeks ago and the kids were bobbing for apples. They were having so much fun. Nephi kept trying to do it - he kept just dunking his head in the bucket of water and was so proud of himself.

On the 31st of August school started for David and I - yes I am going to school again. I need something to do that is a challenge for me and that I enjoy doing. I am taking 2 classes. One is online and it is a class on the family in society and the other is in class two days per week and is a child development that covers infants through adolescents. So far I am enjoying them. David is taking 4 classes (a full load) and his are communications, economics and math classes. So we are busy - but it's a good busy!

I love this picture of Nephi. He came in my room one evening and climbed under the bed and was using the bedskirt as his blanket. I thought he looked really cute laying there!

So that's our month in a nutshell and now we are just plugging away with our routine every week of taking kids to school, going to school ourselves and picking people up.

As for a health update, I saw my doctor a few weeks ago and my bone marrow was too suppressed to do chemo right then. So, today I went and had another blood test and I am at about the same levels, in some areas I am a little worse than last time. I go see the doctor tomorrow and I think he was hoping to do chemo this week, but I know with the numbers that I have now, that it would not be good, so I get a few more weeks off of chemo. I am enjoying feeling almost normal and I love that I have energy to be a part of things. I don't really want to go back to doing chemo so right now we are debating it deciding the pros and cons and counting the cost. I feel good, although I am still very tired.

Life is good, family is great and I am loving every minute of it.

An Apostle in our Town

2010-08-15T17:54:00.000-07:00

Last night right after Faith sang, David and I left the kids with Grandma & Grandpa Morgan at the field and the little ones were home with Grandma Eve and we headed over to the church. It was Stake Conference weekend. We had an Apostle from the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles come and speak to us. For those of you who don't know about our church, it is organized like Christ organized the church in the Bible. We have the First Presidency which is the Prophet and his counselors, then we have the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles. They all reside in Salt Lake City, UT and frequently travel the globe to visit members of the church. There are so many members of our church in so many countries that they only make it Sacramento every so often. We were very blessed that L. Tom Perry, a member of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles, came to visit our Stake and speak to us. David and I went up to him last night and shook his hand and met his lovely wife.

It was a unique and wonderful experience to sit at an apostles feet and be taught. I felt the spirit and knew that, even though it was hard to sit there physically and my kids were crazy loud today, I knew that I was in the right place at the right time doing the right thing. I was reassured of the love the Lord has for me and I was reminded that He really does know everything that is going on in my life. I was reminded that He has experienced all this and that He wants what is best for me and my family. What a blessing to live in this day and age, when there are so many things that are good for me to see, feel and hear. I needed yesterday and today to remind me that I am not alone. Not only do I have a wonderful husband, great kids, a wonderful family and awesome friends, I have my Savior. I am one blessed lady!!

One of the Coolest Things

2010-08-15T17:51:00.000-07:00

Last night David and I took the 3 older kids, Faith, Hyrum and Vilate and went with my parents to the River Cats game. Faith had tried out and been chosen to sing the National Anthem at the game. It was so cool! Because she was down on the field preparing to sing the song, they also let her throw out one of the first pitches along with some other kids.

We were told that we would get some pictures and a DVD of her performance from the River Cats. When I get them I will upload them for your viewing pleasure.

She really did a great job and I was a proud Mama watching her out there on that huge, beautiful field and seeing her on the big screen! So cool!!!

Happy 5th Birthday to Gloria

2010-08-10T14:14:00.001-07:00

July 28th was Gloria's 5th birthday and we had fun celebrating. We had a lot of activities planned on her actual birthday - too bad they were all for the older kids! We did end the day with a pink frosted cake!!

We threw a party the next week at the park. It was simple and I made the greatest pinata! It's a Honey Nut Cheerios box covered in a bag that you put presents in. I taped tissue paper on the top to make it more authentic.

It was funny that this pinata lasted longer than any other pinata we have ever used. The string broke and at the end David was having the big kids play baseball with it. It was hilarious.

Gloria loved being the birthday girl. She loves to give hugs and kisses. She is a sweet girl that loves to be a girl. She loves dresses and pink shoes. She loves it when I call her princess. Gloria loves to play with Nephi. They come up with some great games. Gloria plays with My Little Ponies, collects Barbies - she doesn't play with them so much as just likes to have a lot of them. She loves Littlest Pets Shop toys and especially playing with the big girls stuff. She is excited to start Kindergarten and can't wait to go to the big kids school. Gloria loves to be read to and would sit for hours if someone would just keep reading to her. She loves to have her hair done. Glo is a happy little girl that makes me smile daily!! I'm so glad she was sent to our family - with her bright blonde hair and big blue eyes. I love this kid!!

HaPpY 10tH bIrThDaY hYrUm!!!

2010-08-09T20:37:00.000-07:00

July 27th was Hyrum's 10th birthday! We celebrated the day by going to the California State Fair. We haven't gone to the fair in years - I think Faith and Hyrum were just toddlers the last time we went. We had a blast!! The kids got to ride whatever they wanted and the favorite was the slide. They were flying!!

After the fair we headed home ate a quick dinner and enjoyed eating Turtle Pie.

David then took Hyrum to the store and bought him his first pocket knife. He was given a $20 budget and ended up being able to buy 2 that were on sale and come under his budget! What a great shopper!!

Hyrum is awesome! I love his happiness. It is contagious. He loves the gospel and tries really hard to be obedient and do what's right. He loves baseball. He looks forward every week to going to Cub Scouts and participating with the other boys. He has recently caught the reading bug and I love seeing him read in his room at night. He loves to play video games - especially Pokemon on the DS and Mario on the Wii. He is a good kid and is learning how to be a better leader among his siblings. He loves to sword fight with Nephi and Helaman and come up with intricate games with all the kids together. I love you bunches Hyrum!! You are a great addition to our family and I can't imagine life without you in it!!!

Enough Already!!

2010-08-03T15:05:00.000-07:00

Just so everyone knows, this is going to be a complaining post. I generally don't post when I feel sad, angry, frustrated or anything else negative. I don't want to be remembered as a complainer or as someone who couldn't deal with things. But today I have had enough!! I am tired of being a cancer patient. I am tired of driving daily to radiation treatments. I am tired of pain and pain medicine. I am tired of not being able to be a mom the way that I used to be and really want to be. I want my life back!!! NOW!

Everyone tells me that I am handling this so well and that I am such an inspiration. But please know that I am not perfect. I have had many "bad" days. My poor children and husband have to deal with me all the time and they can attest to those days. I am grumpy a lot more than I should be. My faith is lacking in many ways. I don't trust my Father in Heaven the way that I should. I don't read my scriptures enough. I don't know enough about them. I need to become much better at that. I don't pray enough. I need to have conversations with my Father in Heaven more often. I'm sure that those things will help my "bad" days become fewer.

Lately I have spent so much time in my bed just laying here missing out on things. I long for the days that I used to do so many things and get them done. I had energy to do them and desire to do them. The desire is there, for the most part, just not the energy. A lot of the reason I have been in bed is because the pain is great and I am having to take pain meds that make me so tired and loopy. I am really skinny now - down more than 50 pounds. I weigh less now than I did when we got married. I know that riding my stationary bike will help with the weight and energy, but riding my bike isn't what I want to do - I should do it anyway.

Really my life is not so bad. My children are all healthy and growing well. They are happy and are very smart and looking forward to going back to school in a few weeks to see their friends. I have a husband who loves me very much and he even scrubbed the bathroom ceiling today for me. He is leading the way to clean out our house and get rid of all the junk. Today he spent hours in the girls' room helping them to get rid of stuff and organize it so that they can better utilize the space and got it done. Tomorrow we are on to the boys' room. He drives me where ever I need to go and makes sure the kids get to where they need to be.

So, today is not so good, but tomorrow will be better and I'm already feeling happier. We are going to take the kids swimming at the club now - maybe I'll get in today. I'm sure it will help me continue to feel better. I know this is really for my benefit and the benefit for my family - but sometimes it just feels like too much. If you are still reading this, thanks for listening to me complain! Sometimes just getting off your chest is helpful. We are going to have some fun now. And I am going to get some hugs from some really great kids and a husband I love more than anything! Have a good day - mine can only get better from here!!

Tattoos

2010-07-25T14:23:00.001-07:00

Just a quick reminder that these tattoos are just dots on my skin. They are black and about the size of a sharpie dot on a piece of paper. They are just so that the techs that do my radiation know where to position my body so that I get the radiation in the right spot. Didn't mean to confuse anyone!! I do not have and am not in the least bit interested in getting artwork tattoos.

Tattoos

2010-07-21T22:26:00.000-07:00

So the doctor's office called this morning and asked if I could come in today instead of Friday. We called a friend to watch all the kiddos (thanks Robyn) and headed out to Rancho Cordova. We met with the doctor and I had to sign a form stating that I understood the risks of the radiation and then off to get tattoos we went. I have 3 more - one on my stomach - right at the bottom of my sternum, and then one on each side about the same distance down on my torso. Let me tell you it was pretty exciting! - being a rebel that is. Just kidding. But they did hurt more this time then I remember them hurting last time.

I will start radiation on Monday afternoon and then I will go for 14 more days in the mornings. They will then follow-up with scans and bloodwork to make sure all is well. Here we go!

It's a slower busy!

2010-07-20T16:34:00.000-07:00

We have been enjoying our summer and are over half-way through with it. We have been swimming - not as much as I have wanted, but some. The kids have been cleaning out their rooms - we went through all the kids drawers and have bags in the car on their way to DI. We have thrown away many broken toys and books and even with all that work - those kids still have way too much stuff!!!

Faith and Vilate are involved in a local group that is putting a play together. They were just cast in the show - Vilate has a lot of lines to memorize and Faith is singing a solo in the show. They are really enjoying it and go twice a week in the mornings.

The rest of the time at our house has been spent playing video games, reading books from the local library, watching a lot (way too much) TV, cleaning house, clearing out drawers and closets and throwing away a bunch of junk! On Wednesday and Thursday here at the apartments there are scheduled activities for kids from 10:30am - 2:30pm. They have a blast playing games and even doing work (math, reading, etc.). They actually said it was fun to do school work over there!

We are planning on going to the State Fair next week. Gloria wants to have a birthday party and Hyrum wants a sleepover for his birthday - we shall see if either of those activities come to fruition.

We have had lots of appointments and places to be, but it has been a lot less than at the end of the school year and we are enjoying the slower pace.

34 days until school starts!! I only know that because Helaman just asked me to count :). He is so excited to be starting 1st grade!! I am so proud of that kid - all of them really. Helaman has become quite the reader and loves to read to anyone that will listen. Every morning the kids all read the "Book of Mormon Reader" together. Helaman can read a whole page by himself and he is so proud of himself. So cool to see!!

Radiation

2010-07-15T18:57:00.001-07:00

Well, they decided against doing the last radiation on my ribs. I went in and saw the radiology oncologist and got the pictures taken and all marked up and then they were able to match up exactly where I was having the pain and it did not coincide with what they had thought was causing it - the tumor on my rib. So they cancelled it.

Because the pain is still there they did a little more investigating and found that the source of my pain is my enlarged liver. It has been enlarged since this whole thing began but now it is apparently rubbing against my ribs or something and that is causing the pain. So the doctors' suggested treatment is either pain control or, more aggressive treatment of radiating my liver. Over the phone when they first recommended radiating my liver they had to tell me the risk - 5-10% liver failure. That was kinda scary to hear.

Since hearing that information we have been trying to make a decision whether to do it or not. We have researched info on the web (what a pain that is!!), talked with multiple doctors, prayed and fasted to know what the best thing for my body would be. I have also sent my medical records on to The Huntsman Cancer Institute located in Salt Lake City, Utah. As of now we are going through with the radiation to my liver. We feel like it is a good option. My type of cancer responds well to radiation, so there is a very good chance this will help my liver to get rid of some of that cancer that's in there. There is risk - 5-10% of liver failure. It can take 3-6 months to show up. We shall go on faith and hope for the best.

I meet with the doctor on Friday to get all lined up and might get another set of tattoos!! So exciting!! When my leg was radiated in January I got 3 freckle-sized tattoos on my legs. I'll let ya all know on Friday!!

Vilate's Special Day

2010-07-10T13:48:00.000-07:00

Vilate was baptized last night at the church. We had a great turnout and it was a wonderful service. Friends of ours brought this delicious cake from Ettore's - a local Italian Cafe. She loved it.

We are so happy for Vilate and pleased with her choice. Right after she was baptized I was helping her change out of her wet clothes and in to her white dress and she was so happy. She kept saying, "Now I'm a member of the church." She was so excited and pleased with herself.

Aren't they are cute couple? I love this picture of the two of them. My wonderful, handsome and worthy husband and my beautiful, sweet and innocent daughter. I love them so very much!!

Thanks to all who helped set up: my parents, David's parents, Tina, Alvina, and Bishop Timpson. And all else who came, helped and showed their support for our Vilate. Your examples and testimonies are much appreciated and bless the lives of us and our children.

4th of July

2010-07-10T13:19:00.001-07:00

Our 4th started off bright and early at the park with the ward. We had a wonderful pancake breakfast. The kids walked, rode bikes, rollerblades, and scooters in a parade around the park. There was a great turn out and the kids had a marvelous time. I really enjoyed visiting with my friends and ward family.

We went home for a bit and then we headed over to Grandma and Grandpa Morgan's house to swim and BBQ and just have a bunch of fun with our cousins!

We missed having the Robinson family with us and we missed the "out-of-towners." But the rest of us had a wonderful time.

After the swimming, BBQ-ing and Yummy homemade ice cream - and after my nap - we went out front and let the kids do some "Morning Glory" fireworks. They love it and had a great time writing their names in Grandpa's gutter. Silly kids!!At the end of the many, many Morning Glories, Grandpa lit a whole bunch in his hand. The kids thought his torch was so cool. He couldn't lift it up like the Statue of Liberty because of all the sparks flying off but it sure was a nice looking torch!

After the festivities we went home and went to bed. It had been a really long, but very fun day!

I love the 4th of July. It is one of my favorite holidays. I am so grateful that we live in a country that was set aside and kept safe by the Lord as a place where the gospel could be restored. I know that I am blessed to live here and be a citizen. I love our flag. Saying the Pledge of Allegiance and singing the Star Spangled Banner make me so happy. They fill my heart with indescribable joy. I appreciate so much those young men and women who have dedicated their lives to serving our country and I pray for their welfare. I am grateful to the Founding Fathers and their vision and dedication to this country. How blessed we are!

I hope you all had an enjoyable 4th of July!!

CBL

2010-07-08T12:58:00.000-07:00

This is the new catch phrase at my house - CBL. It stands for "Come Back Later." Every night the older 4 kids ask if they can CBL. With summer and little kids in the house we still make everyone go to bed by 8pm. We try for 7:30, but we usually make it by 8. Nephi is accustomed to laying on the couch with Mom and/or Dad with all the lights out and a boring show on TV - boring meaning entertaining for us but boring for him such as NCIS, The Office, Everybody Loves Raymond, etc. For him to fall asleep he needs there to be no distractions - especially kids around.

So we send everyone to bed and once Nephi - and Gloria are sleeping they can usually CBL. I just think it's so silly that they have come up with a code word so Glo and Nephi don't know what they are up to. The older 3 came up with it and Helaman caught on really quick so he hopped on board. They usually CBL and stay up until around 10. I am in bed by then and some nights I know they push that time even later. David stays on top of them, but he tries to get to bed with me before 9. We are getting old and we get tired.

My kids are so funny and I love their little codes.

The Boy who drives me crazy....

2010-07-01T23:24:00.000-07:00

Today Nephi was a crazy man. I love this little boy - but he is oh so 3!! He spent most of the day begging us to take him to the "90 - 90 - 90 - 90 cent store" (99cent store) or demanding candy and soda. When he wasn't whining he was doing the silliest stuff. At one point he came up to me cupped my face in his sweet little hands, looked into my eyes and said, "Mommy, I am really proud of you." I responded, "For what." His response, "I - don't - knowwwww!" Followed by a giggle attack! It was sooo funny.

This little guy is more crazy than I remember my other two boys being. He hates to be told No and when someone tells him that he needs to wait a minute, his response is: "It's gonna take forever!! UGH!!" or "I NEVER get it!" Hilarious stuff that comes out of his mouth everyday makes me laugh and sometimes want to strangle him all the same time! I cannot imagine life without this handsome little boy in it!! Love you Nephi!!!

Doctor visit

2010-06-23T16:05:00.000-07:00

I went into the doctor today and here's what happened:

Yesterday afternoon I started feeling some pain on my right side. This morning it was still there and a little worse. So, I called the advice line and they made me an appointment with my doc. I saw him and he looked over my last scan and poked and proded and has come to the conclusion that the cancer on my lower right rib is growing. He gave me more pain meds and has now referred me to get radiation again - this time on my side. As of my last scan the cancer spot there had been stable, but with the pain he thinks it is growing so that we should be proactive and radiate it.

Other than that I am feeling much better today. This round of chemo was hard to recover from. It's been one week and I am finally feeling pretty good. I do take some pretty heavy duty meds, but they are low doses so I don't feel so out of it.

I like all the people at the radiology place so it will be nice to see them again - not that I am looking forward to driving out there over and over again. But if they can get this thing under control I will be a much happier camper.

Just thoughts

2010-06-22T23:23:00.000-07:00

We have had a very busy day and I have taken all of my medicine - which usually puts me to sleep, but I am not feeling sleepy at all!! So I thought that I would blog a little about what's on my mind tonight.

I am so grateful for my family. I have the world's greatest kids who love me and who are more than willing to jump in and help (most of the time) when I need it. It has been interesting to watch them over the past 13 months transition from kids whose mom did everything for them to being more independent and helpful. I have a fantastic husband who is helping to teach the kids to be independent and taking care of me. He really loves me and that is an amazing blessing to me daily! I have great parents and in-laws who love me and support us in everything. They arrange their very busy schedules to help us and to be there for support whenever we ask them. I am blessed with brothers and sisters (natural, step and in-law) who also support us and are willing to help whenever we need it. I have nieces and nephews with testimonies of the gospel and sweet spirits who are concerned for my health and I get to play with and love. As you can see I am blessed with an amazing family!!

I also have fantastic friends who I love to visit with, go to dinner with, go to see silly teenage movies with and just enjoy! To borrow a line from Faith and Vilate's book - My friends ROCK!!

As much as I am blessed, I feel it so strongly today of all days. You see today is the day I beat the odds. The median life expectancy for my type of cancer is 8 - 13 months. Today is 13 months and one day. I have won!! Yes I know I'm not cured, the fight's not over and I don't know what the future holds, but according to the doctor, my body is fighting this thing. I am so grateful to all my family and friends - it is because of you that my body is fighting. You give me hope, you give me support and most of all, you give me your love! Thanks for sharing your sweetness and your hope for me. It definitely keeps me going!!

I love my life - as much as I hate chemo, I am learning how to rely on the Lord. He is good and He wants me to be happy. I am happy. Many people might think that sounds weird, but I truly am. I know that being happy is up to me. I can choose to "love the road that I am on" - and I do. The road I am on is not always fun, but it is a good road and I have a great destination that I am headed for. Thanks for all your love!! ~ Kaci

Vilate turns 8

2010-06-22T22:45:00.000-07:00

We have another 8 year old in the house!! Today was Miss Vilate's birthday!! We started off the day with donuts then on to pick up friends, McDonald's for lunch, swimming at Del Norte and then home for spaghetti dinner and ice cream sundaes. It was a very full and fun day!!! Vilate is going to be baptized on July 9th (Friday) at the Stake Center at 6pm. We are so happy for her - she is super excited and spending this week practicing being a peacemaker - her primary teacher gave her that assignment and she is having a difficult time, but hasn't given up yet!!

Vilate is such a dynamic kid. She loves her friends and her brothers and sisters. She is passionate and while that has it's benefits, sometimes she goes a little overboard!! Vilate loves to take care of others and help them. Vilate loves school and dreams of being either a teacher or a rock star. She loves to play the guitar and piano. For Christmas she got a microphone and loves to sing into it through the amplifier just like she's on stage. She also uses her easel and old school papers to play classroom and she is always the teacher. The little kids love playing school with Vilate. Vilate has a tenderheart and always wants to fix things and help people to get along. She has an obedient spirit and likes to be the enforcer!!

As much as she sometimes drives me crazy - I love this kid with all of my heart and I am so SUPER grateful that she came into our family!! Love you Vilate - I hope you had the happiest of Birthdays today!!!!

Movin' along

2010-06-16T19:48:00.000-07:00

Well I have successfully completed 15 rounds of chemo. So far I feel just fine. It will hit me in a day or two and I will be really, really tired. Other than that I should be just fine.

On Tuesday night Vilate, Helaman and Gloria completed a 6-week art class through Sutter Cancer Center. It was a magnificent class with wonderful instructors who, using art, opened the door for discussion on cancer. It was great for the kids and they are sad that it is over - but they loved showing us all their art projects.

While they went to their class, I had a class of my own. Nancy, my mom, came with me to most of the classes - in fact she just didn't come to the 1st one because I didn't think about it until after that first class. It was a group therapy class for people affected by cancer - either have/had it or are a caregiver. Mostly it was the parents of the children in the art class. At first I was not quite sure what I thought of it. As the class went on, I looked forward to it every week and I am really sad that it is over. They will start up another one in the fall - both art and the group therapy. This time it will be an art class for older kids. Vilate will be able to participate again and Faith and Hyrum will go as well. The little kids will be sad - but they will do another "little kid" class later in the fall.

We met great people. I feel like I made some good friends and I am grateful for technology - email, facebook and blogs - to be able to keep in contact with them. I wish them all the best in their challenges and adventures.

As for my foot - according to the doctor on Monday, the radiologist said that it is officially NOT broken. YAY!!! I was so glad to take that boot off. At the doctor I weighed my self with it on and then with it off - it weighed over 3 pounds!! Crazy!

Now I am boot-free and my foot is feeling good. I have horrible bruising on top of my foot and it is still very tender, but I can wear my flip-flops with no problem, so all's good!!

My doctor's appointment went well. I saw a different doctor as mine was called out on an emergency. This new doctor said he doesn't subscribe to the strict diet that my doctor does. He thinks that there is really not enough evidence that it makes that big of a difference. So now I am kind of torn. It doesn't help that I also have lost about 5 pounds in the last month and that is really dangerous. So, I am going to add in a few things, but not get too crazy. I will be also working harder at getting on the bike in my living room and exercising. I think moderation is the key. So that's what my plan is for now, let's see how good I can stick with it!!

I must say I am so excited that I get to have Dreyer's Strawberry Ice Cream again!!! Ohhhhhh I love it sooooo very much!!!!! I also got to go and get Leatherby's Peppermint Ice Cream and that was oh so de-lish!!!

Bye for now!!!

Nephi turns 3...Yipee!!

2010-06-12T22:13:00.000-07:00

Today was a great Saturday. It was Nephi's 3rd birthday and we started the day with a trip to the park. We invited friends and family to meet us at the park for a little party in the morning and it was delightful. I have pictures that I will upload, maybe tomorrow.

He loved playing and hitting the pinata. He sure got mad when his turn was over and had a really hard time waiting for the Transformer to be broken open. The kids all had a fabulous time. I really love doing simple parties like that at the park. The kids seem to all enjoy it, the adults get to visit, it's CHEAP, easy clean-up and I'm not dead tired at the end! It was a great party!!

Following Nephi's party we came home for lunch, cleaned the kids rooms, dropped Hyrum at another birthday party and headed over to yet another party. I'm telling you it was a party day!! The kids loved going down a waterslide and running around with their friends. I love all the end of school festivities, there are just so many and packing that many things in only a few days really tires me out - but it is worth it to visit with all my friends and watch my kids have a blast!!

Thanks to everyone who opened their homes to us. We have had a fantastic time!!

As for my foot - it is feeling much better. I don't believe that it is broken. The docs did say that they weren't 100% sure - the x-ray was of a spot where many bones overlap. David wants me to wear the boot for a while longer and see how I do. I have consented for now, but that thing weighs a ton and is hard to move around in. I go into the doctor on Monday for a "check-up" so that I can start round 15 of chemo on Tuesday. I don't expect to get really any news due to the fact that I haven't had any tests. Next week is busy with chemo and more parties/playdays - but thankfully it won't be anything like this past week was!! Today David finally had had enough driving around and bouncing from one thing to the next. I totally felt his pain as he asked me what else was on the schedule for today!! I am ready for the bouncing to stop and I am excited for a slow summer. I doubt it will really happen - but a momma can dream right?

Of all the rotten luck...

2010-06-10T14:40:00.000-07:00

We are in full swing, end of school mode right now with crazy busy schedules. Between 2 Father's Day parties, one Preschool graduation, an end of baseball season party with one team, final baseball games, Angel Island, art classes, end of Girl Scouts parties and more, we have been swamped!! Then yesterday I was bringing something in from the car and it dropped on my foot - guess what?!?! I BROKE IT!!! LAME!!!! I can't use enough exclamation points!! So today I drove out to Kaiser and got x-rays then ended the trip getting my very fashionable boot put on. Lucky for me I made it back in time for Gloria's preschool presentation and graduation. Now here I sit with my foot up and ice on it. This is no fun!! Only 3 weeks and 6 days to go and then I can get rid of this silly boot.

Other than that we are doing great! The kids are enjoying all of the festivities and we are as well. I don't like school to end - not because the kids will be home more, but because I will miss the association with the other parents. It's nice to have friends. I hope everyone has a great summer vacation - see ya in the Fall!!!

Camping, Morphine, and kiddos

2010-05-26T21:06:00.000-07:00

Last Friday we trekked out to Camp Nauvoo in Placerville (about an hour east of us). As we were approaching Placerville the rain started coming down. By the time we got there it was pretty much pouring! I was so mad! You plan all this time and then you get there and it's ruined. We decided to stay for dinner and the campfire program and then we loaded up the kids and drove home. All things considered, it was fun. The kids got to throw rocks into the creek. We got to eat a yummy dinner and enjoy the campfire. The kids performed on the stage at the campfire. Gloria even got up and told a ghost story - which I'm told she giggled most of the way through - I was back at the van getting Nephi and myself in warmer clothes. On the way home we got stopped in a Driver's License check point and the officer asked us how much David had had to drink. We responded with, "Absolutely nothing." to which he responded, "You do realize that it is Friday night, right?" What?! Not enough people to pull over I guess.

On Saturday I started Morphine and let me tell you it was HORRIBLE!! I took it for 3 days and I couldn't function. David was great and waited on me hand and foot and after the 3 days I had to stop taking it - I was having breathing trouble. So I called the doc and he lowered my dose by 50%. I just started that today so we shall see how it works. So far, so good.

Vilate left Tuesday to go on her class's "big" fieldtrip of the year. They went to Calaveras Big Trees and Mercer Cavererns. They were supposed to go Tuesday thru Thursday, but after terrible weather yesterday and a freezing night last night, they did what they could today and packed up and headed home. She was a little disappointed, but seems to have had a great time! Thanks to all the moms and dads who kept an eye on her - as well as all the other kiddos of mine that went traveling - Hyrum to Yosemite and Faith to Marin Headlands.

By the way, I figured out why I was so mad at everyone a week or so ago. It was the Vicodin. I had forgotten that it makes me really grumpy. Once I remembered and stopped taking it I was back to the occasionally grumpy normal. Man it was sure scary - for me and the kids when I was so angry. Things are much better now - hopefully Morphine won't cause the same temperament change.

How's it really goin?

2010-05-20T14:33:00.000-07:00

Last week I had a CT scan - let me just tell you to start off that those are my least favorite. I have to drink only clear liquids for 4 hours before the scan, then 2 hours before my appointment I have to drink 10 oz of this yucky barium stuff. I have to drink 10 oz again 1 hour before and then again 30 minutes before. It is nasty tasting stuff. After drinking my stuff I go to the radiology department at Kaiser and check in. Then they have me lay on a bed and try to find a vein. In fact it is so difficult to find one of my veins that they have to go and get one of the ER nurses and it always takes more than one stick - this time it was only 2. Yay nurse!!! Following the stick they take pictures, which only takes about 30 seconds. Then they inject the iodine and take another 30 seconds of pictures. A lot of preparation and misery for less than a minute worth of pictures!

The last time I had the iodine I started sneezing and my throat got sore. At the time they said that I might have developed an allergy tot he iodine, but not to worry about it. They kept me for about 30 minutes afterward for evaluation. This time as soon as they injected the iodine my mouth started itching, my throat got sore, I sneezed and my eyes were itching so bad I wanted to dig them out! So this time they sent me to the ER. The got me on some meds right away and the symptoms subsided. I only had to hang around for about an hour, but COME ON!!! Really, an allergy to something else?!?!?! So frustrating. They told me that next time I need to let my doc know so that he can premedicate me so that I don't have the reaction. Good times!!

Anyway, I went to my doctor yesterday and had to have my "pre-chemo" checkup. They check my blood levels and just make sure that my body can handle the next round. The doc reviewed my CT Scan and according to the report and the pictures, my cancer is still stable!!! I have 6 months of stable scans and stable weight. That is HUGE!! He said that even though we have lowered the dose of the medicine, my body is fighting this cancer. AWESOME!!! I was so worried walking in there that the news was going to be bad, but at the same time I felt calm and peaceful - I can't really explain how that worked - feeling both of those at the same time, but I did and I was super relieved that everything was stable.

He did prescribe Morphine for all the joint pains that I have been having and I will be starting that on Saturday. You see I am not allowed to drive once I start on it for a few days while I see how my body will react. It wouldn't be safe and I could get pulled over and get a DUI - don't really need one of those. So, David will be done with school on Friday and will be available to be the chauffeur for next week so that I can just relax and try the meds. So, if you see me next week and I am acting a bit strange please don't hold it against me. Hopefully I will be able to tolerate the Morphine just fine and hopefully it will help to control the pain.

I started chemo today and, as is always the case, I am feeling great today. I always seem to have more energy and drive on chemo days then others. Maybe the nurses and other patients just inspire me. They all seem to be happy and have a good attitude. It really is a great environment to be in - crazy huh?

On my mind...

2010-05-16T20:54:00.000-07:00

As I sit here and think of all things that we have done lately - playing and watching baseball games, doing puzzles with kids, having Nephi, Gloria and Helaman cook me delicious plastic food in the Elmo kitchen, driving David to school when he missed his bus, driving kids here, there and everywhere, missing events and all the other things that I could be blogging about, and none of them seem really important at the moment. Don't get me wrong - it's not the kids that I am talking about, it's just all the "stuff" that has to be done on a daily basis.

We went to my brother and sister-in-law's house tonight for dinner. I was so angry before we went. I got so mad at the kids and by the time we got there I felt so horrible. I asked Kelli (my sister) to go inside while I talked to the kids. David had a meeting and was unable to go. I apologized to the kids, told them how sorry I was and asked for their forgiveness. They were so sweet and said that it was okay and that they understood and loved me. Do I have the greatest kids or what?!

We had a really good time visiting with family and watching family home videos that Jarrod took 5 years ago. It was neat to see Faith, Hyrum, Vilate, and Helaman, as well as the other cousins, when they were little. They were so cute!

On the ride home we listened to some church music on the way home and one song really struck me. Here are the lyrics:

I know that my Redeemer lives.

What comfort this sweet sentence gives!

He lives, he lives, who once was dead.

He lives my ever living Head.

He lives to bless em with his love.

He lives to plead for me above.

He lives my hungry soul to feed.

He lives to bless in time of need.

He lives to grant me rich supply.

He lives to guide me with his eye.

He lives to comfort me when faint.

He lives to hear my souls complaint.

He lives to silence all my fears.

He lives to wipe away my tears.

He lives to calm my troubled heart.

He lives all blessings to impart.

He lives, my kind, wise heavenly Friend.

He lives and loves me to the end.

He lives, and while he lives, I'll sing.

He lives, my Prophet, Priest and King.

He lives and grants me daily breath.

He lives and I shall conquer death.

He lives my mansion to prepare.

He lives to bring me safely there.

He lives! All glory to his name!

He lives, my Savior, still the same.

Oh, sweet the joy this sentence gives:

"I know that my Redeemer lives!"

He lives! All glory to his name!

He lives, my Savior, still the same.

Oh, sweet the joy this sentence gives:

"I know that my Redeemer lives!"

Text by Samuel Medley

I have heard this song so many times before. I grew up with this song and had memorized the words while in High School if not before. It was a song that we sung often at church. Today, though, it struck a chord. As I was typing the lyrics just now, I thought, "I should mark this line as particularly special to me." The problem with marking individual lines? They all are so special to me. This is my testimony. I am so grateful to the Savior - to MY Savior. I am struggling with my health right now, but my testimony is growing in leaps and bounds. I know that my Father in Heaven and Jesus Christ have a plan for me and my family. I know that regardless of what happens with my life - whether I live to be 80+ or die in just a few months - the Lord will take care of me and my family. The kids will be fine. They will learn from this whole experience. Their faith will grow and they will gain testimonies of their own. David will also grow and become a better man. I will be a better mom and wife to all of them. There is a purpose for this trial and I intend to gain everything I can from it.

I know I have said it before, I truly appreciate all of your prayers and kind words in my behalf. Your kindness and generosity humble me and I am inspired by each one of you and your families. I pray that you will be blessed. Enjoy your week - we are busy this week, but we will get it all done and be better for it at the end of the week.

Love to all, Kaci

Still Here

2010-05-14T21:47:00.001-07:00

I am still around and just trying to get through the end of the semester for David and all the kids lengthy fieldtrips. We are busy doing laundry, dishes, vacuuming (don't tell Nephi - he's terrified of the the vacuum), cleaning and packing - not to mention all the driving to and fro. I am hoping to update on the goings on around here this weekend - maybe tomorrow night or Sunday.

Quick health update: My pain level has reached new highs. I am now taking Vicodin regularly and it seems to help the pain. Other than that, I am a little tired, but all things considered I am doing great. Most of the time I feel good and I have noticed the more involved I am in the goings-on around here, the better I feel, physically and emotionally. I had a CT scan last Monday and I will get the results on Wednesday at my next doctor's appointment. I have my 14th round of chemo scheduled for Thursday and Friday of next week.

The biggest problem lately for me has been my memory. I have forgotten 5 or 6 things this week - places I needed to be, obligations and assignments that I was supposed to complete and I totally blew it!! I guess it is just "chemo brain" at it's finest! I have determined if there is anything in the future that I schedule, I must immediately punch it in on my calendar - otherwise it is not gonna get done. Good news is: I remember that I have an awesome husband and 6 children that rock. I have yet to forget one - although I was late to pick up one on Thursday because I got distracted - I hope that doesn't count - I was only 10 minutes late! :)

All is well here and we are really looking forward to this summer. I hope you are too!

Airplanes

2010-04-07T21:25:00.000-07:00

Today we got to go to a local airport and see an ultralight plane up close. It was a blast. Brother Bardin (a friend from church) brought his plane for the Cub Scouts to come and see it. Siblings were invited to attend, so we packed up the crew and headed to McClellan. The kids got to sit in the plane. They all thought it was pretty cool. The kids got to watch Bro. Bardin take-off and then he flew by and touched down then went up again. It was cool because as he was leaving to return to Lodi, where he is a flight instructor, to return his plane, he waved with the plane at us. The kids, and parents, all thought that was pretty neat. Thanks Bro. Bardin for showing us your plane!

P.S. Thanks

2010-04-06T21:34:00.000-07:00

To all out here who read my blog (or notes on Facebook) and then leave comments, Thanks! Your words of encouragement and love are such a blessing for me. Keep the comments coming.

Easter with the Morgans

2010-04-06T21:24:00.001-07:00

I know these posts are out of order, but I want to get them on here.

We had a great time last Friday night at my parents' house. We went for dinner with the family that lives nearby and then had an egg hunt for the kids. Th

e kids loved the candy and dinner was fantastic!! It was raining outside so we had to hold the hunt inside and we used the entire downstairs. I am pretty sure they found all the candy - with 17 kids looking I don't think they could have missed one!!!

After the egg hunt the kids nestled in with Grandma and Grandpa to watch "The Princess and The Frog." I sat on the stairs and got this picture -

I think I was able to get everyone except Abram. He's only 15 months and kept wondering in and out of the movie. We are also missing Natahlie, Skylar and Morgan - they all live out of state and weren't able to make it - we missed you guys!!

It was a great night. Thanks Dad and Nancy for hosting!!

Locks of Love

2010-04-06T21:04:00.000-07:00

For a year Vilate and I have had a battle over her hair. It is long and gorgeous - if she would just brush it!! She hates spending the time on it and refuses to wear it in a ponytail, braid or anything that might look even slightly girlie. So, after spending over 30 minutes trying to brush it out on a Sunday morning, I laid down the law and told her she was getting it cut and donating it because I was done dealing with it. She was mad at first and cried, but then came around - especially when I told her that I would take her out after to get an ice cream cone!

So, here is her haircut/photo shoot:

Before:

During (please notice the smile):

Here's the after (She wanted to hold her hair in the picture):

Enjoying the spoils! Oh it was so hard to sit there and not eat any ice cream - especially when I had to walk up there with Vilate to pick out her's and I saw the Chocolate with Peanut Butter!! But I exercised total self-restraint and didn't have any!! Yay me!!

I think that she looks great. I think overall she likes it. She has no problem brushing it and I am so glad that I don't have to spend so much time and hurt her to brush her hair out.

Oops, I forgot!

2010-04-04T20:43:00.000-07:00

I promised someone that I would blog what happened to us. The week before we were headed to Disneyland we were out at Deseret Industries - actually we were meeting with a counselor at LDS Family Services, in the same parking lot, with whom we were discussing how to tell the children the severity of my cancer. After our session, at about 6:15pm we headed out to the car in the rain and found our front window broken. Some really lame people (or as Gloria and Nephi refer to them: the bad guys) broke into our car and stole our DVD player, radio faceplate, some CDs and the remotes to both the radio and DVD player. And it was RAINING!!!!! David and the LDS Family Services security went out in the rain and cleaned up the glass and taped up the window with packing tape until we could get it replaced the next morning.

Talk about lame timing!! The next morning David took the car and got the window repaired and then I started looking on Ebay to replace the faceplate - we were leaving for Disneyland in just over a week - can you imagine a ride in the car with 6 kids and no radio?!?!? I'm sure many people have done it - I know as a kid we did things like that - but it just sounded like a nightmare to me!! I also researched DVD players online and ended up at Best Buy and got a really nice new one.

So, what did we learn from this experience? Don't leave things out in plain sight, remove the faceplate EVERYTIME you exit the vehicle - besides isn't that why we bought that model?, and that what was taken are all just things that can be replaced. We were grateful that they didn't take the whole car - man that would've been a nightmare! I am grateful we were in a safe place and that the people there were so helpful.

Spring Break & Emotions

2010-04-04T13:30:00.000-07:00

We have had a pretty low-key Spring Break. We went to 4 baseball games and just hung out here at home. I was pretty wiped out from last week's chemo. This time they up-ed my dose to 70% (the last two rounds I had a 50% dose). It has been a difficult one.

The worst was Sunday when my body hurt to touch. Slowly over the past week things have been improving. But I must admit this has probably been the hardest week of this whole experience. A few weeks ago we informed the kids of how serious my cancer is. We had shielded them prior to that. I could tell that they were concerned and the doctor said that we should prepare them for anything that might happen. He suggested that with my blood levels being so low, I could go in to the hospital for a fever or infection and not make it out. He said that most cancer patients die from a fever or infection, not the cancer itself. So, we told the kids. Man that was a hard few weeks. The first conversation was about resurrection and that Jesus Christ was resurrected and that we will be also one day.

The next week at Family Home Evening we asked what they knew about my cancer and Hyrum said, "All I know is that Mom has cancer, but she will be fine." We decided in that moment to jump on that. We told Hyrum and all the other kids that that was true, but not in the way they were thinking. We proceeded to tell them a little more about my cancer, that it was a bad one that might take my life sooner than we would like. We told them about me getting sick and that that could take my life sooner that we would like. There were a lot of tears, but amid those tears David and I were able to bear our testimonies and share the love of the Lord with these wonderful children. We were able to tell them that no matter what happens Heavenly Father knows what is happening and that He will take care of all of us. We, of course, told the kids to ask any questions that they had or will have in the future - that we would love to talk with them and help them.

I m so grateful for this precious children that were sent to my home. This past week has been emotionally difficult for me - I don't want to leave these children or my husband! I am their mother and I want to continue in that role until I'm around 80 or so - even longer if I can. My doctor has prescribed a new diet and I started last Monday with no sugar or dairy in my diet. I also do not eat red meat (including pork). I can have very limited chicken (like maybe once a week) and I am allowed fish daily. I am a HUGE fan of dark chocolate and ice cream. What a major adjustment this has been for me. I am doing well and exercising extreme self-control, especially as today is Easter and the kids got buckets full (literally) of candy! I also have to exercise daily, so we have invested in an exercise bike - gotta love Craigslist!!

I have had the "it's not fair" thoughts and feelings - that is until today. Last night it all kind of came out at poor Dave. I just lost it and couldn't stop crying. He held me for hours and asked me to not give up hope, but to exercise my faith - he said I had a lot of faith. Today was the second day of General Conference (GC is a satellite broadcast from Salt Lake - our church headquarters. During GC the leaders of our church: the prophet, apostles and other leaders - known as General Authorities, speak to us and teach us what we should be doing, where our focus should be.) It was a great day where I got to listen to many General Authorities bear their testimonies of the Savior. It reminded me of my testimony and buoyed up my faith and encouraged my hope. I have a renewed sense of who I am - a daughter of a loving Heavenly Father who wants nothing more than my success. Whether my success be here on this earth or on the "other side" I know that He will care for my family through whatever may come.

So there you go, I am caught up, I think! I love the Lord. I love my family. I love my friends. I am a blessed lady who couldn't ask for much more. Thank you for including me, and my family, in your prayers. We feel the power that comes from those prayers and truly appreciate your love. May you all have a happy Easter and enjoy the times that you have with your loved ones - I know I will!!

Still playin' catch-up

2010-04-04T13:11:00.000-07:00

This past month has been filled with lots of stuff! We got a new couch - I love it. We set leprechaun traps and when the leprechauns came they left green snickerdoodles and green stamps on the kids faces and arms. It was a great "leprechaun's day" at our house. That week the girls were in a school play. It was a play that Faith was in over the summer last year called "Multiplication Nation." Vilate was type cast as a lackey that got into a fight - more than one parent commented that it was a part right up her alley!! On 2 of the 4 nights Faith played "Nova," the lovely assistant at the circus and as such had to sing a pretty difficult solo. The other 2 nights she played smaller parts and Vilate had other parts as well. It was a great play - really fun to watch, but I am super glad it's over as they were practicing between 3 and 6 days a week for the past 2 months!

The Saturday after the play performances was Opening Day at the baseball fields. We love Opening Day, but it sure was a long one this year. We got there at 7:30, after dropping the little ones off at a friend's house (thanks Sarah). Started with a pancake breakfast, headed over for one team's pictures then waited for the opening ceremony to begin. I got a great seat in the front and was able to see all the teams parade in and then hear Helaman say the Little League Pledge for the entire league. It was great. He memorized it and said it with feeling! After opening ceremonies we went on to the other team's picture and then off the first game. We picked up the little kids to go with us to the final game of the day and we were FINALLY done around 5:15. Long, but awesome day at the park. I love watching the kids play baseball!!!

Following that weekend I had another round of chemo and just spent the week going to games. We have up to 4 games per week and the older kids play 2 hour games while the younger ones play 1 hour games. It gets a little busy, but this is the kind of busy that I like.

Disneyland

2010-03-22T14:25:00.000-07:00

What a magical trip we had. We left on Thursday and drove in a really nice rental van for many hours. The kids did great - it helps have treats, coloring activities, an ipod and a DVD player. We did hit LA around 6 or 7, so we did get experience LA traffic - CRAZY!! I told David multiple times that I was glad we were only visiting and not living there.

We checked into our hotel and then met my parents at the McDonalds across the street from Disneyland. We all ate dinner at 8pm and Grandma and Grandpa gave the kids each a gift - a lanyard with some pins on it so that the next day in the park they could trade pins with others. They also go David and I Mickey and Minnie Mouse ears. I wore mine almost the entire next day while at Disneyland, but David left his back in the hotel room - silly boy!! After dinner we headed up to bed - the kids wanted to stay up, but we knew the next day was gonna be long and encouraged them to go to sleep.

We got up in the morning at 6:30 and then got everyone ready. Then we headed over to the park. We all got there around 7:45 and easily got our tickets and then got to go into the park. The kids were so excited. My dad and I went off and got me an electronic wheelchair and then we met back up with everyone and off we went to experience the Magic! We went on Pirates of the Caribbean first and let me tell you that was really funny! Vilate was scared, Helaman was very nervous and Nephi watched the entire ride through his fingers that were held tight over his eyes. Gloria thought it was kinda scary because (according to her) she thought all the pirates were real and going to kill us - What an imagination!!! Faith and Hyrum, Grandma and Grandpa, and Mom and Dad LOVED IT!!! Following that adventure David and I took the 3 older kids on Indiana Jones while the 3 little ones got to go with Grandma and Grandpa to Tarzan's treehouse.

The rest of the day was spent going on various rides, eating Churros (yummy!!), eating food and treats and just having a great day! At one point we met up with 2 of Dave's sisters and their families - wish we could've spent more time and then we met up with a friend of David's from many years back. It was great to see everyone. I only wish our trip could've been longer so we could have visited more with family and friends.

Grandma wins the award for standing in the longest line. Gloria really wanted to see the princesses and Grandma volunteered to take her. After the longest hour of our lives, I had joined the line about 45 minutes into the wait, we made it in and boy was it worth it. Gloria was so excited to see Jasmine, Sleeping Beauty and Ariel. She went up to each princess and gave them a big hug and posed for a beautiful picture. When waiting to greet the next princess she would bounce and get so excited. It was perfect! Thanks Grandma for waiting in the line!!

While waiting for this line, the other kids went shopping with Grandpa for some souvenirs and then Grandpa went to get Faith a wheelchair. She injured her foot over a year ago and it keeps flaring up - we have since been to the doctor and they have determined that she has too much room between her 1st and 2nd metatarsals and will need to go to Shriners Hospital to get some custom made orthotics. David then pushed her around in the wheel chair for the remainder of the day.

After the "Celebration" parade Grandma and Grandpa took the 3 younger kids back to the hotel (THANKS YOU GUYS SOOOO MUCH!!). David and I got to stay at the park with the 3 older kids and ride some really fun rides. We rode until the park closed and then took advantage of the extra hour that the store were open and went shopping. The girls needed to buy their souvenirs and so did I!!

On our way out to return the wheelchairs (we had 2 at this point - Faith needed one because her foot was causing so much pain) we ran across a little boy and a double stroller looking for his Dad. We took him to "City Hall" and once he was safe with the security guard, we left the park. So sad were we to have to leave, for we had had such a great day. We were all very tired and got back to the hotel to relieve Grandma and Grandpa. Sleep was very welcome that night for everyone!!

The next morning we slept until 9 and checked out of the hotel at 11 then hit the road to drive back home. The trip home wasn't as exciting as the trip there and there was a lot more, "Are we there yets" and "I'm boreds." But we made it and I must admit that it was a wonderful idea for us to go!! I can't wait until we get to go back!!

There are more pictures posted on facebook if you want to view more of our adventure. I am not a huge fan of uploading pictures to blogger - it takes forever and I really get annoyed with formating the writing and putting in pictures!!

Lunch

2010-03-22T14:15:00.000-07:00

For my birthday a few friends of mine couldn't make my party so they offered to take me to lunch. We met at Chevys after I dropped David off at school. I took Gloria and Nephi with me and they were pretty well behaved until near the end when Nephi started his acrobatic tricks and making a bunch of noise! Gloria loved eating at a "rest-a-raunt" and visiting with new friends. These women among the women that I really admire and try to emulate. I had a great time - Thanks ladies!!

Off to school

2010-03-22T14:14:00.000-07:00

I just took this picture one morning on our way to the car. I was walking behind them and thought they looked pretty cute. Faith is such a helper and is great at getting Nephi and Glo to the car in the morning.

Party time

2010-03-22T10:49:00.000-07:00

For my birthday this year there were only 2 things I wanted - and they kinda went together. I wanted to have a birthday party that we could dance at with all the kids and I wanted David to sing to me. I thought it sounded pretty easy and reasonable.

David agreed and my wonderful parents helped to organize it - actually Nancy did most of the work and we got a bunch of friends to pitch in and help with set up and clean up.

The only bummer: I didn't take any pictures!!! Oh I am so bummed!! Anyone with pictures, I would love copies. You can email them to me at kacicox@hotmail.com or you can send in the mail. Let me know if you need an address.

I went to the church in the morning and helped set up. Then I picked up kids from school and we came home and visited with Grandma & Grandpa Cox and Aunt Susi. We headed over to the church and finished setting up and getting the food ready. Then we had to run back home and pick up the kids and headed back to the party. We ate lasagna, salad and bread and had yummy cake for dessert.

The only difficult part of the day was when my dad had to go and have a procedure on his heart. Lucky for us the procedure went well, no problems were found and he and Nancy made it to the party just a few minutes late.

After dinner Jarrod (my brother) sang a song that was beautiful. Then David sang 2 of my favorite songs: "This is the Moment" from Jekyll and Hyde and "You Raise Me Up" by Josh Groban. It was awesome! I have it recorded on my digital recorder - just have to figure out how to get it on my computer.

Following the singing we danced - well first we talked, then we danced. It was great to see so many people there. I am so grateful to everyone who came and I am SO very grateful to Nancy and my dad and all their planning, hard work and financing. As for everyone who was there to set up and clean up, THANK YOU!! Thanks for making it memorable and fun for my family. The kids had a great time and loved the dancing and singing.

To quote one of my kids (can't remember which one): "That was the best party EVER!!"

Chuck E. Cheese

2010-03-22T10:36:00.000-07:00

My sisters came into to town the last week in February with their kids. We all met one day at Chuck E. Cheese with all the little ones - the big kids were in school.

Gloria and Nephi found this horse and wouldn't get off. They absolutely loved it!!! It was their favorite thing and Nephi was so sad when other kids wanted a turn.

Can you tell he was enjoying it?

Helaman's VIP Week

2010-03-22T10:25:00.000-07:00

Helaman has been looking forward to this week for the entire school year. Each kid in his class gets a week to be the VIP. They get to be the line leader and bring in something daily to show-and-tell. To introduce him to the class for VIP I made a poster with pictures of him from when he was born up until his 6th birthday. Here he is sharing his poster.I got all the other kids out of class so that they could come and see Helaman present his poster. Nephi and Gloria were there, but they refused to get in the picture. Helaman loved being the VIP and had a great week!!

Birthday

2010-03-22T10:17:00.000-07:00

For everyone who has a birthday at my house, I stay up late at night and decorate. When I was a kid we would wake up in the morning on our birthday's to a decorated downstairs. I loved it, it made me feel special and I wanted to continue that with my children. So, this year I was so thrilled when I woke up in the morning on my birthday to this:Faith and Hyrum decorated for me. What great kids. I felt very blessed to have these kids who were thinking about me and wanted to do something nice for me.

Girl Scout Cookies

2010-03-22T10:08:00.000-07:00

Faith and her Girl Scout Troop went to Raley's one Friday afternoon and sold Girl Scout cookies for over 4 hours. They sold 300 boxes and had a great time!

They thought it was super cool to have that much cash in their hot little hands. Faith wanted to show us all the cash they made.

Vilate did her site sale the next morning at a different location. She had a great time as well!

Nephi

2010-03-14T19:47:00.001-07:00

Nephi loves to wear glasses. David wears them for reading and had just bought a 3-pack of reading glasses at Wal-Mart. Nephi thought they were for him. He was so excited and wanted to wear them. I thought a picture was totally in order for this occasion. Aren't they cute!

Nephi has fallen asleep in the funniest positions. When he is tired he eventually just crashes where ever he ends up. It just doesn't look comfortable to me at all!! I did move him to the floor with a pillow after taking pictures.

Percy Jackson

2010-03-10T15:48:00.001-08:00

Faith wanted to go to the movies for her birthday. She wanted to see the midnight premiere of Percy Jackson and take a friend with her. The tickets went on sale and there was no midnight premiere. She was bummed but decided to go to the Friday night showing. I talked her into taking Vilate and Hyrum along with her friend and she seemed to be okay with that. We told (via Facebook) friends that we were going and we ended up with a pretty large group from her school. It was cool. I spent the week leading up to the movie hunting for orange shirts at thrift stores and then silkscreening on the front and back of them. It was a big project - I ended up making 9 t-shirts! It was fun, but I was sure glad I didn't have to make a 10th one!

Here is a picture of Faith and Karrin waiting anxiously for the movie to start. Notice the cool shirts!! On the back they say Poseidan's Cabin.

The kids enjoyed the movie, but we spent the ENTIRE ride home discussing how it was a good movie, but they should not have called it Percy Jackson. Apparently my kids think "based on the book" should mean "follows the book to the letter." I tried to explain it, really I did - but they just didn't get it. So in the end they determined that it was an exciting movie and they really did like it, however they thought it should have stuck closer to the book or be renamed something else (no one gave me any suggestions).

She's 11!!!!!

2010-03-10T15:37:00.000-08:00

HaPpY bIrThDaY fAiTh!!!!!!!

Faith turned 11 on February 10th. We had a great day. She went to school and took Twinkies to share with her class - her bonehead mom only bought 30 and there are 34 in the class!! What a total dork - but it all worked out, some kids were absent and others didn't want one. For dinner I made her favorite: Chicken Tetrazzini and then we had Turtle Pie for dessert. We only do parties on even years so this year was just a quiet affair at home.

Faith is amazing. She has such a strong testimony of the gospel and she knows who she is. She hates doing the wrong thing and has a hard time understanding why anyone would make bad choices. That doesn't mean she always makes the right ones, but she is pretty on her game. She loves to hang out with her friends and always wants to fix the "girl drama" that comes along with 9 girls hanging out together. She loves to help and has become quite the cook (mac & cheese and grilled cheese sandwiches) and kitchen cleaner. She loves to stay up late and watch TV with mom and dad. Faith is always willing to help with whatever I need her to do and smiles most of the time. She is an excellent student and loves going to school. I love this kid and hope she enjoyed her birthday and look forward to seeing her continue to grow up and mature. She is a huge bright spot in my life!!! Love ya kid!!!!

Feb 7th - 13th

2010-03-03T21:19:00.000-08:00

We just go from one busy week to the next around here. On the 7th I spoke in Stake Conference. In our church we have a lay ministry and everyone, or most everyone, gets the opportunity to speak in our Sunday meetings. Twice a year we have Stake Conference - a meeting on a Sunday for the 6 or 7 wards in the Stake. It is held on Saturday night from 7-8:30pm for the adults and then on Sunday morning from 10am - 12pm for the entire family. I was one of the 3 members of the stake asked to speak at the Sunday morning session. There were other speakers, but 3 of us are just congregational members. It was a wonderful experience and if you missed it, I do have a written copy I could send you if you are interested. It was on trials and how we deal with all the negative stuff that goes on around us.

On Sunday, David also made, or almost made his first batch of Rice Krispy treats. He was so cute, "That's all you do?" "Ummm....maybe you should stir..." I helped him out and we finished them up together. We are so very proud of him and his accomplishment!! :)

Monday I delivered our blankets and then I picked up my new hearing aid. For those who hadn't heard I lost one at Sac State - I set it in my lap in the car while using my Bluetooth and then got out of the car and didn't notice it was gone until we were half-way home. David went back at least twice and I went once to look for it, but alas - it was gone. So, I had to order a new one, thank goodness Kaiser covered it.

Tuesday I saw my doctor - no real change - he did decide to cut my dose of Etoposide in half and try that for a while. That was good - less toxins = less side effects. More about that later...

On Tuesday night we had Helaman's kindergarten play. He was an alligator and he did an awesome job!! The play was the best one I have seen all the kids seemed to know their lines and project really well. It was just his class so there were 23 kids in the play. It was great!! Helaman was a little disappointed because he wanted to be a snake not an alligator. His teacher couldn't figure out why - she gave him the part with the whistle and a few lines and thought he would be thrilled. We figured out his disappointment had to do with the costumes. To quote Helaman, "The snakes look like Rock Stars!" They had sequined vests. Funny boy!!

Wednesday Faith had a birthday - more later....

Wednesday I started chemo again.

Thursday I had chemo again.

Friday was the kids' Valentine's Day Parties. They all came home with bags full of Valentines and candy. I had to make a bag for Nephi so he would stop yelling at them to share. Poor kid felt left out. He was sad until he got his own bag.

Friday was also the Percy Jackson and the Olympians movie - more later....

Saturday the girls had play practice and it was mine and David's 12th anniversary. Thanks to Natasha who watched the kids so we could go out to dinner. We went to the Fat City restaurant in Old Sacramento. It was really nice and a fun night.

So that was the week. Busy, busy, busy. But good busy!! I will give more info on those special events. I will try to update that tomorrow...we shall see if that works out.

Disney "Give a Day"

2010-03-02T10:57:00.000-08:00

I really, really, really want to take my kids to Disneyland. When I was a kid we went with my mom a few weeks before she died and it is a great memory that I have. Then in following years my dad took us and we loved going! I remember visiting my cousins on those trips and going to the beach. The whole experience makes up a lot of my childhood memories. So, I want to at least once take my kids to Disneyland. They get to go when they're 8 with Grandma and Grandpa as well, but I want to take them! So I told David that I had heard about this promotion that Disney is doing - "Give a Day, Get a Day." As I looked into it I found a local organization that we could make blankets for and then we could get free tickets to Disneyland. You have to start at Disney's website and sign up there, so I signed up for us to all make a blanket for an organization located about 30 minutes from our home. Here are the kids making their blankets:

Helaman chose an army print for his blanket. I did help him with his. He was so happy when he was done. He was very proud of himself and earning his own ticket!

Vilate did her blanket by her self and was so pleased. I think I helped her with one or two but she did a great job.

Hyrum stayed up late one night to get his done. He did it with absolutely no parental help. It was great because it was something that I only had to show him once and he just sat down and got it done. That very rarely happens with this kid. He is brilliant, he just wants to do what he wants when he wants with no one telling him different and he really doesn't like being reminded that he needs to get something done. I think enjoyed making the blanket.

Faith also made her blanket in an evening. She loved doing it and kept bugging me to help with mine. She loves making things and helping others, so this was a great project for her.

I signed up Dave, myself, Faith, Hyrum, Vilate and Helaman; Gloria and Nephi weren't old enough. I also got my parents on board. They got their blankets made and they will be going with us. We bought a bunch of polar fleece (I spent close to $100) and then we spent the first weeks of February trimming them and tying them. It was so fun. The kids loved it.

We are planning taking our trip to Disneyland next week. We will drive down on the 11th, go to Disney on the 12th and head home on the 13th. A quick trip but we hope for good weather and great memories!!

Mag, blood, party

2010-03-02T10:54:00.000-08:00

I finished off the first week of February with a Magnesium infusion and a blood transfusion and then go to go to my good friend, Dawn's baby shower. She gave birth a week later to the cutest little girl! She looks just like the Valentine kids and I'm sure they are enjoying having her in their house! It was a fun shower with a great turn out and wonderful food!

BANG!

2010-03-02T10:50:00.000-08:00

I am going to fill in the month of February so that everyone - including me can catch up! It started out with a BANG - and not necessarily the best one! My dad went in on the 1st for an angiogram and came out with 3 stints and the knowledge that he has some heart disease and needs to change a few things. The bummer is that he is a pretty healthy guy - he walks frequently, eats well and tries to do his best. I am glad that he hasn't had to suffer any major problems with his heart and continue to pray for his heart to function. I love my dad and my moms. I am a lucky girl, blessed with parents (all of them) that love me.

Quick update

2010-02-26T08:34:00.000-08:00

So sorry for my lack of communication over the last month. I keep thinking that things are going to slow down, but I think I just have to buckle up, sit back and enjoy the ride! We have been busy with lots of fun stuff and I will update more later, just wanted all to know that I am doing well. I am excited to see family and friends this weekend! Things are busy, as always, but a good busy and I wouldn't change it for anything!!

Look for more updates early next week.

Wax Museum

2010-02-03T21:35:00.000-08:00

I've said it lots before, but the kids really do go to a great school. For a 5th grade history project the kids all had to research a "Famous Dead American" and write a paper on them, including a timeline and bibliography. There are 68 kids in 5th grade and they each had to choose a different American. Faith was so excited to learn about Elizabeth Blackwell - the first woman doctor.
She did a great job on her report and really enjoyed using the computer for research and then typing up her paper. After their reports are turned in the kids all portray their Famous Dead American in the Wax Museum. David snuck out during the Pinewood Derby and got to see the Museum. I stayed at the Pinewood Derby and got to tour the Museum the next morning. My parents were able to arrange their schedules to make it in the morning. Nephi even enjoyed it. It was amazing how 68 5th graders could hold so still and be so quiet.
The local news station even came! Here is the link: http://videos.apnicommunity.com/Video,Item,718520550.html.

Faith was so excited to be on TV!! The kids got to watch the video during school and thought it was very cool!

Faith made her own backdrop - she drew it and colored it in. I did go over her outline with a marker but she did the rest. I made her skirt and lab coat. It was fun for me and she sure looked great. We put her hair in a bun - which she thought was kinda fun, but had too many bobbie pins. It was a great project and the kids learned a lot.

Pinewood Derby

2010-02-03T21:11:00.001-08:00

We had a great Pinewood Derby last week. The kids had a great time eating popcorn and the bake-sale treats. Here is a picture of them waiting on the "front lines" for the races to start!Nephi got a blue cupcake and you can see how much fun he had with it!! Vilate sure loved the bake-sale and moved right in to help with accepting payment from people and making change. She loves doing anything with money - who doesn't?
Hyrum's car is the black one with the pink sticker. He hadn't come up with a name before hand and so quickly named his car "The Unknown."
His car went really fast! He ended up winning for the Bear Den and came in 4th over all! It was especially great considering that 40 minutes before the race - 10 minutes before we were supposed to leave to go weigh in, one of our wheels got superglued to the car and wouldn't spin. David broke the wheel off and he and Hyrum worked on replacing it. Then we got to the weigh in and the car was over 0.3 ounces. Thanks to Mike Ducker for using his tools and removing those 0.3 ounces of wood just in time to meet the 6:30pm deadline!

Hyrum and Helaman were having a blast! They kept running around the cultural hall excited and running up to me saying, "Hyrum got 1st again!" I think he only came in 2nd in two of the races. It was really exciting. Below is the picture of the boys that won in the Bear Den. Pretty cool!!!

A Couple of Extras

2010-01-22T20:49:00.000-08:00

I had the greatest time on Wednesday night. You see Faith is going to be Elizabeth Blackwell (the 1st woman doctor) in the Wax Museum on Wednesday night and Thursday morning at school. It is a great project that the 5th graders do at their school. Faith has to dress up to look like Elizabeth Blackwell and make a scene 3'x3' for the Museum. She will stand still for 20 minutes at a time while parents and students walk through the Museum. Fun stuff!!! So, back to my great time on Wednesday night - I decided to sew her costume and I had a marvelous time getting it cut out and prepared to sew. I had forgotten how satisfying sewing it. I absolutely LOVE it!!! I am making her a full skirt and a lab coat. I am now about halfway done and look forward to spending the next few days on them!

On Thursday night I had a great time with some of my church friends. Eight of us moms in the ward got together for a night of dinner (which I missed because of the Ancestor Dinner) and visiting. The visiting was great!! So nice to hang out with friends and not have to worry about what your kids are getting into or breaking up arguments!!

My Tuesday doctor's appointment went well. The latest scans show no growth - Dr. Cen called it "stable." That is really good news considering that I have had 9 weeks off of chemo. My blood levels are still a little low and that is concerning. Dr. Cen decided not to put off treatment any longer - but to instead give me a 50% dose of only one of the med and completely stop the other. So now I only take Etoposide and only 1/2 the dose - which makes my chemo now only 2 days a week and only 3 hours the first day and 1 hour the second. NICE!! The side effects should be considerable less - so we shall see. So far, so good. The biggest reason for stopping my Carboplatin is the neuropathy. It is awful. My hands and feet feel like they are asleep and tingle if anything touches them. My feet also feel swollen and numb and my balance isn't so good. I have fallen a few times, but never hit the floor - I am pretty good at catching myself. I am trying these socks now that are supposed to help with my feet and so far they seem to be helping - but I'm not sure if it is psychological or really helping. I guess time will tell. I hope the socks work - first because they are very expensive ($40 a pair) and second, it would sure be nice to not have my feet hurt!

All in all, things are going well. We bought David's books for school today and classes start on Monday. His schedule will be full - 5 classes, 15 units. He goes 5 days a week and we will miss having him around here, but I'm sure he will enjoy his semester. I have rediscovered my love of sewing and I hope to do more of it over the next few weeks. Other than that, we are just following the routine. I hope you are all doing well. Please know how much I appreciate your love and prayers, your thoughts and kind words - they totally keep me going, give me hope and make me feel great!! Having friends is a blessing that I have in great abundance! Thank you!!

Week in Review

2010-01-22T20:25:00.000-08:00

On MLK Jr. Day my parents invited all of us to the movies - and by all of us I mean 17 grandkids and 7 adults (9 if you count G'ma & G'pa). We ended up with 16 grandkids and 7 adults. We saw "Fantastic Mr. Fox." The kids seemed to really enjoy it - I had to leave about halfway through with Nephi. We walked the mall and had a good time seeing all the things you can see at the mall.

Tuesday Gloria started preschool again and had a marvelous day. I must say, as much as I love this little girl, it was so nice to not have her talking to me for those 3.5 hours. She has so much to say all the time!! She has gone all week and loved making new friends, playing "pet store," coloring pictures, writing letters and getting stickers for working hard.

Tuesday was David's birthday. He is now 41 years old!! To celebrate we went to a doctor's appointment and then out to Leatherby's with my parents. Leatherby's is one of our favorite places and it was nice to visit with my parents.

Wednesday I was back in chemo. It was only 3 hours and I got a really nice nap. Thursday was more of the same - but less time. Then on Thursday night we went to an Ancestor Dinner for Vilate. She has been studying our ancestry for the past few months and as the culminating event we went to see her class sing some songs and then we all ate some really yummy foods from different countries. Hyrum was at scouts and we left the 2 little ones home with Grandma Eve. It was a nice evening,

Today we took Gloria on a school fieldtrip to the pet store. Helaman, Nephi and our friend Lorelei went with us. The kids got to pet a lizard, see the fish, pet a hamster and guinea pig and see some dogs getting groomed. They all walked away with a frisbee and had a great time.

So, we had a pretty busy week. Tomorrow is the Polar Bear Plunge - a ward activity where crazy kids and some really whacky adults jump into the Welch's pool. It is very entertaining! My kids look forward to it and the older 4 will get into the pool with the promise of a hot tub when they are done!

Happy 6th Birthday Helaman!!

2010-01-18T17:28:00.000-08:00

Well, it's official - Helaman doesn't have to sit in a car seat anymore and I think that is his favorite birthday present! For his birthday we opened his presents - we got him a remote controlled dunebuggy and the Disney movie "Pete's Dragon." - then sent him off to school with Ding-Dongs to share with his class. He spent the day before his birthday at Kaiser getting x-rays on his right arm. Apparently Hyrum sat on his arm and it was still bothering him the next morning so I took him in. It is not broken just a little sprain, so he had to wear that splint for a few days. Good times!!We lucked out that his birthday was on a Friday night. We invited his entire class (with 23 kids), his cousins and some great friends to meet us at the church and we had movie night. We watched "Sharkboy and Lavagirl" on the big screen (thanks to Russ and Bishop Smith) with hot dogs (thanks Duckers), popcorn (thanks Tina), and licorice. We had a GREAT turn out and the movie was a good choice for all ages. We finished off the night by singing Happy Birthday, opening presents and cleaning the building. Wow - what a mess popcorn makes!!! Not the best photograph, but it gives you an idea of how full the room was. It was so much fun! Thanks to everyone who helped and everyone who came.
Helaman is a great kid. I love that he will share anything - as long as it's his idea. He loves to make people laugh and is the king of silly stuff around here. Helaman is a great baseball player and has been asked this next season to play with the older kids due to his skill and love of the game. He is so excited to be in Kindergarten and reading real books. He hates putting away laundry and cleaning his room and usually tries to sneak playing his DS when he should be doing his chores. He has a sweet smile - love the dimples - and his hugs are the greatest. I love you Helaman and I hope you enjoyed your birthday!!

New Year's Eve fun

2010-01-18T17:15:00.001-08:00

On New Year's Eve we took the kids to John's Incredible Pizza. We got smart this time and went around 3pm and played games first, then ate at their great buffet. It was so nice that my kids actually ate this time and didn't bug us constantly during dinner to go and play. The kids really had a great time and David and I were able to better enjoy the whole experience!Nephi fell asleep on the way home in the car, but we let everyone else stay up and watch the Disney channel while we waited to ring in the New Year. We enlisted Grandma Eve to come over and watch the kids for a few hours so that David and I could pop-in to a Stake Date Night party. We played games and visited with wonderful friends for a couple of hours and then around 11:30 made our way back home to celebrate with the kiddos.

Poor Helaman, he made it to 11:15pm before he totally crashed on the couch. We tried more than once to wake him up for the poppers and sparkling cider, but he just was so asleep! In the morning he was so mad at all of us because he missed the party, so we let him do poppers and have sparkling cider for breakfast.

All in all it was a really fun day. The kids were a little disappointed that we didn't have a party like last year with friends to spend the night, but I think they enjoyed themselves.

Updating

2010-01-17T17:33:00.000-08:00

Hi guys!! I didn't realize how far behind I had gotten. Give me a day or two and I will be caught up! Things around here have been busy and I am worn out, but I really need to catch up. So, my goal for the week is be all caught up by Thursday night...we shall see how it pans out....

The Snow

2010-01-17T16:58:00.000-08:00

The Monday and Tuesday after Christmas we took the kids to the snow for the first time ever! My good friend, Dawn's parents have a cabin in Soda Springs (just West of Truckee) and they were generous enough to let us all come and stay for the night and play in the snow. With the supplies that they had there and then borrowing a few odds and ends from other friends, we were able to outfit everyone in snow clothes. We had snowball fights, went sledding and just loved playing together. We also brought up our new Wii so that once we got too cold we could have something fun to do inside. It was a great 2 days and I am so grateful for Dawn & Joe and their hospitality. I will have to post some pictures, but I was lazy and didn't take any of my own - I have to get them from Dawn!

Nephi's so talented

2010-01-17T16:48:00.000-08:00

Here is some video of our talented little one. Vilate got a microphone for Christmas and we hooked it up through one of David's amplifiers. Nephi had a blast - so did everyone else - singing in the mic.

Elves do good work!!

2010-01-17T16:32:00.001-08:00

Santa always leaves candy on the table and it stays out for the entire day. The kids love that they can eat candy all day long. This stuff lasted at least 4 days, as I recall. That's longer than ever before. I was really proud of myself this year. I had almost all of the presents wrapped a week before Christmas. I usually wrap most on Christmas Eve once the kids are in bed, but this year I only had to wrap around 5 and we were in bed before 10pm. I was so happy!
Each kid gets one or two presents from Santa and their stockings are usually overflowing. This is David's, mine, Nephi's and Faith's.
Here are Vilate's, Hyrum's, Helaman's and Gloria's. They were so excited in the morning!

We are so blessed to have such good friends and family. Our Christmas this year was phenomenal and would not have been so full of gifts if it were not for our very generous friends and family. Thank you all so much for your kindness, thoughtfulness and generosity. Please forgive the lack of thank-you cards, but writing is becoming increasing difficult with the neuropathy that I am experiencing. We are so grateful to you for your love and support! We had a very Merry Christmas and hope you did as well!!

Traditions

2010-01-17T16:17:00.001-08:00

I love traditions and I love that we have created some really fun traditions for Christmas. My ultimate favorite is carried over from when I was a kid. We go Christmas caroling on Christmas Eve to 5 or 6 families and deliver a plate of goodies. This year we started earlier than in years past. As soon as it got dark we headed over to our first stop. We always sing the same songs: "Jingle Bells" and "Rudolph," followed by "We Wish You A Merry Christmas." Then we leave a plate of treats. We visited 5 houses and were home around 7pm. A perfect activity. When we got home the kids opened their new pair of jammies - another fantastic tradition. Here is the picture of them together in their new jammies.Following this picture we sent them to bed and Santa's elves got to work!

Christmas Eve

2010-01-17T16:05:00.000-08:00

We had beautiful weather on Christmas Eve Day, so we took the kids outside to play on the playground. They spent their time riding bikes, scooters and skateboards, drawing with chalk and playing on the play structure. It was so fun!Faith drawing Santa going down a chimney.
Gloria at the top of the slide.
Hyrum lounging on the slide - he actually kept going down sideways, it was funny!

The Gingerbread House

2010-01-17T15:59:00.000-08:00

I am going to confess here that I never have made a gingerbread house - a big one - with the kids. At preschool they have all done the milk carton/graham cracker ones but I have never done one at home - the potential for a mess was holding me back. This year a wonderful friend bought my kids this kit and we put it together. It was a huge mess, but it was a huge blast! Gloria loved sprinkling on the sprinkles and Nephi loved eating all the candy. The big kids were much more particular about where their things went and making patterns, but the little ones just thought it was marvelous to make a mess! Here's the finished project. How'd we do?

Breakfast with Santa

2010-01-17T15:47:00.001-08:00

We had a great time at the Ward's Annual Breakfast With Santa. The waffles, pancakes, and sausage were yummy! Santa (actually a good friend of ours) was fantastic. The kids loved dressing up in different costumes for the manger scene. Nephi and I were the kings! It was a blast. The kids also loved the games of tag and chase that they got the other kids to all join in on. It was a good morning.
I am so grateful that we have these kind of activities for our family to go to and participate in. Our kids look forward to this particular activity every year and I love that we get to visit with our friends. Thanks go out to all the people that worked so hard on this activity!!

Happy Mom!

2009-12-16T08:11:00.001-08:00

I went to the doctor this week for my pre-chemo check-up. While there the doctor decided that he was going to give me Christmas off. He thought that with my levels (blood) being so low it wasn't a good idea to start another round and then with the holidays coming, I might enjoy some time off. So, I don't have to have chemo again until the 5th of January. You have no idea how exciting this is for me. I was so worried that on Christmas Eve and Christmas I would feel terrible. I am so grateful for this blessing.

With my levels being low, they gave me a blood transfusion yesterday and today I am still tired, but I feel much better. Today's goals include: typing Hyrum's report for him, doing the dishes, wrapping the last of the gifts I have, cleaning the living room/kitchen area and making carmel. We will see what really gets done. I love this time of year and we seem to be so busy going to such great activities and visiting with friends. I must say though, I will be glad when this week is over. We have 8 things on the calendar in 3 days. It's gonna be busy, but they are all fun things - so it will be great!

Broken Finger, Tattoos and Good News

2009-12-01T20:57:00.000-08:00

Broken Finger:

I failed to mention in previous posts our adventures the night before Thanksgiving. The older 4 kids were out in the living room - unattended for a few minutes - and decided that it would be fun to turn all the lights off and run around the room, weird I know, but they did it. Faith was sitting on the floor messing with something and one of her siblings jumped onto the couch using her hand as a springboard. The finger started swelling and was causing so much pain that we headed over to the ER.

You know that you go the ER too often when the receptionist recognizes you! We walk in and she said, "You're back! But this is not the kid you had with you last time, is it?" She remembered me from Vilate's tooth incident. Crazy!!

Turns out Faith has a broken finger - on the growth plate! Now the fingers are taped together and we are awaiting meeting with orthopedics just to make sure the finger will grow normally.

Tattoos:

Today I went and met with the radiologist and they have decided to do radiation on my right upper femur. I have been having pain there a lot lately and they know that I have a pretty big mass there. So, I have 10 days of radiation to look forward to over the next 2 weeks.

When they do radiation on my femur/hip area they have to line me up exactly so that that they get it in the right spot so today I got my first 3 tattoos! They tattooed my hip on both side - twice on the right. It didn't even really hurt - I was surprised! They are really small.

Good News:

The results of the radiation on my brain are so great! We saw the pictures and most of the cancer is gone!!!!!! YAY!!!!! I still have little "lesions" in my brain, but they might continue to shrink. They will do another MRI in few months to see where we are at. It is so nice to get some good news!!

I am feeling good and seem to have a fair amount of energy. I wish it was more, but for now I am okay. Thanks to all of you who have brought and are planning to bring us dinners. They are a great blessing and help to our lives. We love you all!!

Health update

2009-11-30T13:15:00.000-08:00

As for my health...here is the latest:

Yesterday I had to go to the ER for vomiting blood and feeling crummy. It turned out to be that I was severely low on platelets and magnesium. The low platelets were the cause of the bleeding and the low magnesium was the cause of the crummy feeling. They loaded me with both and I felt much better.

The latest test show that my cancer is shrinking - albeit very slowly. My radiation follow-up appointment is tomorrow - but we already have been told that there is "marked improvement." I will let you all know what we find out after the appointment.

Some days are better than others. I have seemed to have a lot of not so great days lately. Lucky for me the people at church and the kids' school have been so helpful with food and gift cards that things have been a lot better than they could have been.

Over the past few days I have thought a lot about what I am learning here. The Lord has promised not to give us more than we can handle. I know that to be true. He must know something about me that I don't because this is sure feeling like a really, really heavy burden. I must be stronger than I know. The Lord has also said that our trials here will seem but a moment - he didn't mean while in them, but once they were over. I totally know this to be true. This might go on for years or it might only go on for a few more months. This might end in my passing on, or I might beat this thing. Whatever happens, when I look back whether here or in the Spirit World, it will seem that this trial passed very quickly. I need to focus on what I can learn from it. I want to learn all that I can from this experience so that I can become a better person - the daughter that MY Heavenly Father wants me to become. So, here I go, off to learn some more.

I am in my 8th round of chemo and have round 9 starting the week before Christmas. I am trying really hard to spend more time with the kids - even when I am not feeling good. I spend a lot of time on the couch, but my kids regularly come over and give me hugs and kisses. I love it! I really love this time of year. The cold air is hard - I don't do cold so well these days, but I do love it. I love the music and the family activities. I am so grateful for the family that I have been blessed with, my kids, hubby, brothers and sisters, in-laws and all those that surround me. I have never felt more loved in my life. Thanks for making me feel so special and important! I hope you all had a great Thanksgiving and are looking forward to a wonderful Christmas or whatever you choose to celebrate. Thanks for checking in! My most sincere thanks and love to you all this Christmas season!

Christmas Kick-off

2009-11-30T13:06:00.000-08:00

We have a tradition in our house where the day after Thanksgiving is the Christmas Kick-off Party. We get up in the morning and have homemade cinnamon rolls and then we set out candy on the table - tons of candy - and we decorate for Christmas.

This year I started on Thursday night and made the cinnamon rolls. Then Faith and David and I put up our Christmas tree. It was an adventure - a new tree and all the branches had to be put on one at a time. But we did and it is a gorgeous tree!

The next morning we got up and cooked the cinnamon rolls and Faith made the frosting. The kids loved them! After that the lights went on the tree and then the decorating began. We put up all the decorations and had a great time listening to Christmas music and snacking on candy. Gloria insisted that all of her ornaments be kept on the same branch. It was pretty cute, but she was so mad when we told her that we wanted to spread her ornaments out. She just didn't get it.

After all the decorating was done we took the kids to my sister Jenny and her husband Marchane's house to hang for the night. The older 4 spent the night and had a great time playing Rock Band on the Wii and roasting marshmallows in the fire place. Good times were had by all, although I still think Jenn and Marchane are pretty crazy and hope that they enjoy the peace and quiet that comes from going from 13 kids back down to 5. Thanks guys!!

Thanksgiving

2009-11-30T13:00:00.000-08:00

Once again, Thanksgiving was a hit! We all congregated over to the church Institute Building at ARC and had a feast. There was so much food it was great! We ended up with around 40 people I think and over half were under 12. The kids love going there because there is so much to do. The kids played pool, ping pong and air hockey. They loved it! Then they would go outside and they could ride bikes, skateboards, motorscooters and roller blades. They also were out there playing street hockey and lovin it. Visiting with people was wonderful and the food delicious. Thanks to everyone that contributed so that my family could have such a wonderful day!!

Girl Scouts and a Birthday Party

2009-11-30T12:56:00.001-08:00

This year Faith's Girl Scout troop made a wonderful Thanksgiving dinner for us. The way the calendar worked out we had to wait a day to enjoy it. It was wonderful! Thanks girls for thinking of us and for all of your hard work! Everything was YUMMY!!!

We got to go and have a lot of fun with my family at Mac, Mariah and Madelyn's birthday party. It was at Jarrod and Jennifer's church building and the kids loved to play with their cousins. Nephi had a great time eating multiple cupcakes - or at least claiming all the rings that were on top. I think he ended the night with 2 Elmo rings, 1 Cookie Monster Ring and 1 Curious George Ring. He was constantly messy, but had a great time!!

New Moon

2009-11-28T14:53:00.000-08:00

Okay so I am a Twilight fan. I wouldn't say I am a die-hard fan, but I do enjoy the escape that the books provide and I thought the story was good. I went to the premiere of Twilight and I had a group of girlfriends that were looking forward to the premiere of New Moon, so I had to go. I had chemo on Wednesday and then came home, ate dinner and headed over to my friend Kelsey's house for a Twilight showing and pre-New Moon party. It was really fun. Kelsey and Amber did a great job of decorating and Kelsey's husband Lance was really great about having all these crazy wannabe 13 year-old girls in his living room. It was great!!

The next night was the premiere. We got to the theater about 8:45-ish and the lines were awful. We actually were almost the last to be let into the lobby of the theater. Everyone else had to wait out side, and it sure was cold - we were really lucky!!

Around 10 they opened the theater and all but 2 of our group were there. We ate ice cream and nachos and loved visiting with each other until the movie started. I did leave the theater one more time to get hot cocoa.

It was a pretty good movie and I only fell asleep once for a few minutes, thanks to Dawn for waking me up!! I think hanging with the girls was so much fun that it kinda overshadowed the movie, but that's okay. A good time was had and I even got home before 3am!!

The next day the kids didn't have school so I didn't have to get up early and they even let me sleep in until 9am. So nice of them!

Apple Hill

2009-11-28T14:26:00.000-08:00

We took the kids to Apple Hill a few weeks ago on a Saturday and had a BLAST! Apple Hill is a really beautiful place just about an hour east of us. It is a bunch of apple orchards and Christmas tree farms that have banded into their own little community. We haven't taken the kids there in years so we thought it might make for a fun day. Grandma and Grandpa Morgan joined us and we had a lot of fun. We started out by the pond and the kids ran on the grass - and up and down a really fun hill.

Nephi insisted on wearing his glasses for most of the day. It was quite amusing. We rode ponies, got faces painted and finished the day off with apple donuts, apple fritters, caramel apples and apple cider. The kids loved the pony rides. Poor Helaman refuses to eat anything apple related, so we just bought him some rolls. He missed out on so much. But as you can see, Hyrum and Vilate were thrilled with their caramel apples!! We had such a great time that I am really looking forward to going again next year. I think we have created a tradition!!

Playin Catch-up

2009-11-28T14:12:00.000-08:00

Okay I am back. I am going to update this blog, but I really want to go in order so I have to start back a few weeks ago. The middle of November has been pretty busy for us. We enjoyed our day off in the middle of the week for Veteran's Day. The kids had to help me clean out the car and then after that they got to play outside for a few hours. It was really fun and they even convinced Dad to come and join the fun. We had rollerblades, skateboards, motorscooters, bikes and all the baseball stuff strewn about the lawn here and it was a BLAST!! Baseball was a big hit - no pun intended. David and the kids had a great time running the bases and getting people out!

The Tooth

2009-11-06T19:45:00.000-08:00

On Sunday morning, the day after Halloween, Vilate woke up with a swollen cheek. Not just a little swollen, mind you, but it was massive. She looked on the left side as if she was Jay Leno with a square jaw and chubby cheeks. It was also pink, so we headed to Kaiser so the doctor could check it out. The doc said it was dental but an infection nonetheless. So they gave us some antibiotics and sent us on our way. ****side note: the doc we saw was my doc when I was a kid - she wasn't with Kaiser then****

We called a member of the Stake Presidency who is a dentist and he said we had done all we could for now and on Monday to call our dentist or him. I got Vilate a new dentist on Monday and we went in. They said it was a real emergency because it wasn't dental and under her chin was starting to swell. The dentist was concerned about her airway and the office staff spent 30 - 45 minutes trying to find us an oral surgeon because they were so concerned about the swelling spreading. Of course at 4:00 it's a little hard to get a same day appointment!!! We came home and I spent the next hour on the phone with the insurance company and an oral surgeon who could fit us in the next day.

So, Tuesday we go to the oral surgeon and they say it is the tooth and we don't need to be concerned about the airway it will be fine. Dumb dentist totally freaked me out for no reason!!!! Oh well. The surgeon says they have to pull the tooth but then the insurance company won't authorize treatment on the same day as a consultation. What?!?!?! The doc has Wednesday off so it looks like Thursday we are heading back. Then they tell me that the insurance won't cover the anesthesia for kids over 6 - Vilate is 7. So I have to pay $225 to get her to sleep - but if I don't I will regret it - Vilate is TERRIFIED of the dentist!! At least she got a note for missing school out of the gig - that was free!!

Thursday we went to the oral surgeon's office as scheduled and they went to look for a vein to put in the IV, but guess what, Vilate's veins are too small! Instead they used an oral cocktail to put her out-of-it. She wasn't sleeping, just dizzy and totally out-of-it. I waited in the lobby and then a few minutes later they came and got me. I spent the next 2.5 hours with Vilate in the room trying to wake up. She cried so much and was so uncomfortable it was ridiculous. Apparently the oral cocktail is harder to wake up from than the IV. No kidding. At one point Vilate was hallucinating that the blinds were attacking her. She was so scared of them. It was the one point of comic relief in the midst of this whole mess.

Now we are back to normal - well as normal as we can be. The swelling has gone, the toothfairy came, and we are finishing up our antibiotics. All is good.

Halloween

2009-11-06T12:47:00.000-08:00

We had a great Halloween. The kids dressed up on Thursday for their school party. They had a great time in the all school parade and I don't think that they even missed me! On Saturday Faith was invited to go to a friend's house for their festivities. We sure missed her. It's amazing that one child gone made the whole family seem so much smaller. We decided that next year she is required to stay with us...I know it won't last forever, but really I like having them all there!

Faith was the pirate chick; Hyrum and Vilate were wizards; Helaman was a scary scarecrow; Gloria a princess and Nephi was the jedi. Just a few sidenotes about their costumes:

The Jedi costume was made 6 or 7 years ago by my very talented sister-in-law, Robin. All three boys have worn it - Nephi has worn it twice. Gloria insisted on the Barbie costume. I warned her that she had to wear a shirt under it and that it would possibly be itchy - she hates itchy costumes. But we got it anyway, she put it on wore it for 30 minutes then decided it was too itchy - UGH!! I got a shirt for her to put on and her response to the brand new white long-sleeved t-shirt that I bought her was, "Barbie's don't wear those!" She was a real pain in the neck about it! We finally agreed to a short sleeved shirt and it even helped with the itching - imagine that: Mom knows what she's talking about!!!! Vilate and Hyrum were both wizards and were willing to wear costumes we already had if they could have wizard wands - $5 a piece and they were done!!! Helaman's costume was my favorite and, I think, the most creative. He had seen these scary scarecrows with pumpkin faces on Scooby Doo and thought they were cool. He determined that if was a scary scarecrow he could scare all the girls on the playground at school and they wouldn't chase him and try to kiss him - really they were kissing on the playground in Kindergarten! He loved being orange and having a scary painted face and he was convinced that his costume worked - I think the kissing stopping might have a little more to do with the principal coming in and mentioning that the next kissing culprits would have to visit her in her office - but what do I know?!?!?!

We went to Trunk-or-Treat at the church, the kids got loads of candy and then we went over to Grandma and Grandpa Morgans to show off our cool costumes! The best part of the night for me was the Big Hunk candy bars that Grandma and Grandpa had at their house. I had forgotten how wonderful they are! We saw lots of friends at the Trunk-or-Treat and had a great evening! I hope you all had a great Halloween!!!

Good Days

2009-10-29T20:55:00.000-07:00

I have really enjoyed these last few weeks of no chemo. Actually this last week has been the best. I was able to go with David and the kids Halloween shopping and we got everyone costumed out!

Today was the school Halloween parade and I had to miss it because I had class and a major test that I just couldn't get out of. I was bummed. The kids' school has a fantastic set-up. They start in the kindergarten classroom and snake through the school showing off their costumes and then the class that just saw the costumes gets in the back of the line. It is really fun. I was sorry that I had to miss it today, but the kids all came home with great reports of a fun parade and wonderful parties.

Gloria had a hard time this morning because her and Nephi were the only two that didn't get to wear their costumes. We told her she could wear her's on Saturday to trunk-or-treat and she seemed okay with that. Nephi wanted to put his costume on also, but he was much more easily distracted.

I woke up yesterday morning and felt almost back to normal. I was not looking forward to yesterday's chemo, but I went. When I got their the nurses handed me a stack of 3 quilts and told me I could choose one to keep. Apparently some wonderful ladies had been making quilts and donated them to the oncology department at Kaiser to be handed out to the patients. They are beautiful. I'm not sure how many were made, but I was lucky that I got one of them.

So, I had chemo yesterday, today and I go back for an hour tomorrow. So far I'm doing good. I have blocked out what it was like the first few days on chemo the last few times, but I feel really good right now - almost like I haven't had any chemo. This new drug is supposed to be less toxic and "easier" than the last one. We shall see if that really is the case within the next week.

All of my assignments are in for now and I am waiting to hear about 2 tests that I have taken. Overall I am feeling really good about school and I am glad that I am going. Although I do wish I had energy for my school and to work at the kids school, but I don't feel well consistently enough to do much at their school. Hopefully with this new drug I will have more consistent days.

I am looking forward to Saturday's trunk-or-treating. I love taking the kids, as crazy and chaotic as it turns out to be in the dark with hundreds of people around and no stroller for Nephi this year, I am really excited to take them. They are counting down the days! What kid doesn't?!?! After Saturday I am planning to focus full force on Christmas. I have no idea what to get any of the kids, they haven't really said what they want yet.

We will be going to Apple Hill (hopefully) in the next few weeks and then it's Thanksgiving and then we have our own little Christmas Kick-off Party the day after Thanksgiving. Then onto December. I love this time of year, but I feel like things are flying by way too fast! We are busy, busy, busy!! We are enjoying the colors of the trees, the cooler weather and all the activities that come in the fall!! Have a safe and happy Halloween!!!

Just Random

2009-10-21T11:56:00.000-07:00

I just finished taking a test in psychology and there is no one home here but me and I felt the need to just get my thoughts down...so here you go. Read at your own risk!

I have lost a lot of weight. 40 pounds since the end of May. I now weigh about what I did when we got married - in fact my wedding ring is now worn on the 3rd finger and I can fit my mom's wedding ring on my ring finger. That says a lot - she had the tiniest fingers! David poked my back and shoulder the other day and said that he likes me more squishy. I totally agree. So I am working hard at eating a lot. A lot for me is like half a sandwich. David has been awesome and he gets me whatever I want - whatever sounds good - whenever I want it. Now if I could just shake this terrible cough that I have!

Last Saturday we took the kids to the school carnival. We were there for 2 hours, spent too much money, won some yummy brownies in the cake walk, managed to only lose Nephi - and only one time, ate a bunch of junk, played a bunch of games and got to visit with friends. It was a fun time!!! The kids had a really good time. I was beat when we got home, but I am so glad that we took the kids.

The kids have had a lot of fieldtrips lately. Faith went to the Chabot Space & Science Museum in San Francisco and had a marvelous time. Hyrum went on a 2-night fieldtrip to Mount Lassen and had a great time walking up a volcano and exploring other things. Vilate went to Apple Hill for the first time and loved getting her carmel apple. Helaman went to the pumpkin patch and they also had a rice farmer come to their school. As you see the kids have been kept very busy. While their school requires a lot, I love it and all the opportunities that they are given. The teachers do a great job!!

Today I feel good. I wouldn't say great, but good is a huge improvement over yesterday. I am tired and my house is a disaster, the laundry needs to be folded and I really should go and clean the bathrooms, the kids rooms are frightening and the mouse's cage needs to be cleaned, but all things considered we are doing well. The important things get done. The kids are learning to contribute more. I am learning to care a little less how well folded the laundry is and how their drawers look. If they can find clean clothes in the morning for school, I am satisfied. My priorities have changed.

My new goal is to not yell. I am terrible. Everyone says, "oh your so patient," or "you never raise your voice." So not true! I am a yeller and I really hate it. So, my goal is no yelling. I love my kids and would hate it if they thought otherwise. I hoping if I make my goal public it will be easier to achieve!!!

As for the next few weeks...we are swamped. I have a mid-term on Friday afternoon. I have a paper due on Oct 30th. I really have to study my phonetics stuff and learn an entirely new alphabet. We still need to get costumes for Halloween. Then there is Halloween and trunk-or-treat. I have a bone scan and Chemo starts up again next week. This is all before November!!! Things are crazy busy around here, but it's a good busy and I don't think I would change it if I could - except maybe the chemo part.

Life is good!

A Quick Update

2009-10-14T21:01:00.001-07:00

Sorry that I haven't been on my game where this blog is concerned. I have been really tired lately and it has been hard to get up the inspiration to blog. I just wanted to give everyone a quick update on what's happening around here. I met with my doctor on Tuesday and he said that the scans show that there is some change - not as much as he had hoped for though. We were okay with it because even slowly killing the cancer cells is still killing them. It would be okay if we could just keep killing them slowly - although faster is better. They are going to give me a few weeks off of chemo - I must say that I was thrilled about that one!! Then when I start up again they will be giving me a new drug - Carboplatin. Carbo is a sister drug to the one I was taking but it is not as strong and shouldn't destroy my magnesium levels and hearing anymore. I am hopeful that the cancer will respond to Carbo similarly as it did with Cisplatin and we will continue to see slow progress - maybe even faster progress - it's just a wait and see kinda thing.

Vilate came up to me the other day and said, "Mom, I don't want to offend anybody, so no offense to you, but it really sucks to have a Mom with cancer." I gave her hug and replied, "You're absolutely right. It does suck to have a Mom with cancer. Ya know it sucks also to be a Mom with cancer." To which she replied, "You're right." Out of the mouth of babes. It does suck to be a Mom with cancer and have a Mom with cancer, but I think that we are doing a pretty good job all things considered.

The kids are growing like weeds and I am not sure I am ready for them to grow up. They are getting more and more independent and occasionally they are even helpful! :) Faith has become quite the kitchen cleaner - I think it is mostly so that she can stay up late after everyone else has gone to bed, but I don't think I will complain. One less thing for David and I to have to do.

Today Hyrum was voted as the candidate for his class to run for Commissioner of Publicity. He will be running against one other 4th grader, 2 5th graders and 2 6th graders. He was so excited that he won the class election. I am so proud of him for wanting to be involved in the Student Council and having the courage to run. He said, "I got 3 more votes than the other girl and she is really popular!" He was so happy!!!

We are keeping busy with fieldtrips (at least one a week), schoolwork, housework, and life. Things never seem to slow down around here. But I think that's a good thing. Our lives are full - full of good stuff!!!

A Difficult Few Weeks

2009-10-03T21:30:00.000-07:00

Last week I had my 6th round of chemotherapy. Apparently most people on Cisplatin (my main drug) don't last 6 rounds. The drug is too hard on their system and their bodies stop being able to recuperate. Well, I made it to round 6 and now my body is rebelling. My magnesium levels are out of control and keep dropping. To treat the low magnesium I have had to go in to the ER and doctor's office for 4 or 5 infusions of magnesium. I have had to have a blood test daily. Yesterday I also had to get platelets. The two worse things about this is that it stinks to have to go to the doctor daily and that I miss my kids. I didn't even see Faith, Vilate, or Helaman on Thursday because after my infusion I had to go and have CT Scan. I didn't get home until all the kids were in bed.

So, now that I have had all the infusions of Magnesium and the platelets, I am feeling better. Today is the best that I have felt all week. I have been using a wheelchair because the low magnesium and platelets causes such severe fatigue. Today I can do more - not much more - but at least a little more.

I am learning a lot and the best thing that I have learned lately is that regardless of how hard this all is and how much it hurts - physically and emotionally - there is one person who completely understands me and what I am going through. Joseph Smith, a prophet of God and the founder of my church, was in Liberty Jail in March of 1839. Joseph was in and out of jail constantly on false charges because people who were not of our faith did like him and did take the time to learn that he was teaching peace and love and tolerance and faith. Anyway, back to this time in jail in 1839, he was tired of jail (who wouldn't be). He didn't want to be there and was having a hard time trying to understand why he was in jail again, why didn't the Lord just deliver him? Here is the answer that he got - Doctrine and Covenants 122:7-9:

"...all these things shall give thee experience, and shall be for thy good.

The Son of Man hath descended below them all. Art thou greater than He?

Therefore hold on thy way, and the priesthood shall remain with thee; for their bounds are set, they cannot pass. Thy days are known, and thy years shall not be numbered less; therefore, fear not what man can do, for God shall be with you forever and ever."

Now I know that the Lord said that to Joseph Smith, but I know he would say that to me. This experience is for my good. I am no better than Jesus Christ and he has descended below all - that means he knows what we all feel like the good and even the bad. He never did anything wrong, yet he suffered for all of our sins - he felt the guilt, the pain, the anguish and the happiness of all that we have done, have gone through, are doing and going through now and what we will do in the future and what experiences we will have. He alone knows all of our feelings. This means I can turn to Him and He will totally understand. What a blessing that I know this. This scripture also says that I shouldn't fear for God will be with me forever and ever - what a comfort!!! What a blessing!!!!

On the 13th I get the results of my latest test results so I will post that when I find out. I have faith that whatever the results show, my Father in Heaven will prepare me and my family. I don't have a feeling one way or the other, I am going strictly on trusting Heavenly Father and that he knows what's best for me and all these wonderful people around me.

So, life has been tough the last two weeks, but I feel like I am on the upside now. We have a busy week ahead and I just don't have time to be sick. Remember the Lord loves me and he loves you. All will be well - just have a little faith!

Build-A-Bear

2009-09-23T19:13:00.001-07:00

A great friend of mine brought us gift cards to Build-A-Bear. Her idea was for us to take all the kids and get them their own bear and then record my voice in the bear, personalizing each one. How brilliant!!! So, last Saturday we took all 6 kids to the mall. It was chaos, but fun. We were there around 2 hours - that did include a quick trip to See's - because let's face it, who can go to the mall without stopping at "the chocolate store" as my kids lovingly call it. Because of the in-store chaos we only got this one of all 6 kids together. I will post the other candid shots that I got on Facebook - it's just easier there.

Here is Faith and her bunny, Ginger.

Here is Hyrum and his bear, Justin.

Here is Vilate and her bear Royal Rocker.

Here is Helaman and his bear, Palkia (apparently the name of a Pokemon character).

Here is Gloria with her bear who she named Bigely at the store, but promptly changed the name to Locksy-Girl when we got home.

Here is Nephi with his bear Blue Guy. The bear is supposed to be on the skateboard, not Nephi, but try telling that to Nephi!

We had a really great time. The kids loved filling and dressing up their bears. I really enjoyed making a recording for each of them - although I must say that 10 seconds goes by really, really fast - that's all the time you have to record. I thought it was kinda funny that I had to go into the boys bathroom to record because the store was so loud.

If you notice the boys all got the same one. Hyrum was concerned that they would get them mixed up, but then I reminded him that I was making each kid their own recording and then he was fine. He was so concerned that they would get mixed up. It's hard to have a little brother who just wants to copy everything that you do. I keep telling Hyrum (and Faith) that copying is a huge compliment and that it means that the younger kids really like you - but they just don't seem to get it.

On Sunday evening Grandma and Grandpa Morgan stopped by for a visit and the kids loved showing off their bears. It was great fun!!!

A Few Great Days

2009-09-15T19:58:00.000-07:00

Sunday was the kids primary program! It was so awesome. For those who don't know: primary is what we call the kids program at church - kids 3 - 11 are in the primary. One Sunday a year they share what they have learned with the rest of the congregation in a Sacrament Meeting (the meeting where we all get together every Sunday). The kids sit up on the stand and sing songs and all get up, one at a time, and tell something in the microphone. It is really cute and the kids are so excited to "perform" and show what they have been learning in primary. I had 5 kids participating in the program this year. Faith, Hyrum and Vilate wrote their own talks and Helaman and Gloria recited a prepared comment. Gloria only lasted on the stand for the first half and then she just couldn't sit still anymore, so I got to go up and sit with her. The kids all did a fantastic job! I look forward to it every year!

Monday was a good day as well. In the morning I was totally lazy and watched mindless TV with the Helaman, Gloria and Nephi. Then Helaman left for school (thanks Krissy for the ride!). When he left we decided to do a craft. I got out the fun scissors, some glue, crayons, colored pencils and fun paper and Gloria and Nephi had a blast making a card for some of their friends - they might never make it to the friends, because I am not sure where they put them - but we had a really fun time making them. It was so nice to just be a mom for a while and do something with the kiddos. Then I took them with me to the hearing aid doctor and got my hearing aids adjusted - they are working great, by the way. Nephi slept through the whole thing in the stroller and Gloria was a model child. After we got home the big kids were finishing up homework (thanks to Lisa for bringing them home). Then Faith and I made apple crisp for FHE dessert. We ate dinner and had FHE then ate a delicious dessert!! It was a great day.

Today was the absolute frosting on the cake!! I started out the day dropping kids at school, Nathan's house (thanks Dawn), and then preschool - Nephi didn't cry for the first time!!!! Then I studied for the next almost 2 hours. I went to my class where we reviewed for the test on Thursday and then I met with the Speech Pathology Junior screener - here's where it gets good!!! We - David and I - have been a little concerned. I am a Speech Pathology major - think speech therapist. Well, you kinda have to hear to help people with their speech and I am kinda losing my hearing. I was so upset when my hearing started to go, because I just made up my mind on my major in March or April. I finally knew what I wanted to be when I was gonna grow up and now I was concerned that these stupid things called cancer and chemo were once again throwing my life off course. Okay, so today I met with Lynda Oldenburg - the junior screener. She looked at my hearing test and called in the audiologist - Jim - and they both said that there is not a problem. In fact they commended me on being proactive and having a positive attitude. Jim actually also scheduled me for another hearing test with my hearing aids in to see where I hear aided. So I go do that on Thursday morning before class. I am sooooooo excited that they both encouraged me to continue. I was really concerned and now I don't have to be anymore!!!! Then to top off the day I got a blood transfusion. I know sounds bad - but it really isn't. It was good for me. I joke that it is like a drug - kind of a "pick-me-up." During the transfusion, which took almost 4 hours, I read my psychology book and got a nap! When I got home I had tons of energy - enough to make pancakes for dinner while I unloaded the dishwasher and I didn't even have to have a chair in the kitchen! It was fantastic!!!

So as you can see it has been a great few days!!! Tomorrow is Wednesday and my break day. David will take the kids to school and the little two to preschool and Helaman and I will hang out in the morning. Once he leaves for school I will have a few hours to myself - homework time!! I am loving school and loving the new schedule. Things here are great!!!!!

Time flies when you're havin' fun!

2009-09-12T20:17:00.000-07:00

It seems like I just updated this thing, but I just noticed that it has been almost 2 whole weeks!!! So sorry!!! We have been really busy. David and I started school last week and it has been an adjustment - we have been spoiled with both of us home and I don't know yet if I like all the being gone.

I have 2 classes at Sac State. One is Phonetics and I absolutely love it! My professor is great and so are all the students in the class. I go to class on Tuesday and Thursday from 10:30 - 11:45, but I am at the school from the time we take the kids to school at 8 until around 1. My other class is online and it is psychology. So far, not so thrilling, but I am hopeful as we delve further in it will become more interesting. David goes to school Monday thru Friday. He is done by noon everyday except Wednesday and that day he is done by 1:30. Nephi and Gloria go to school Tuesday thru Thursday and seem to be adjusting to the schedule. Nephi has a hard time with the drop off and Gloria is really ready to come home when we pick her up, but overall it is a fantastic program and I am so grateful for all their teachers. It is a blessing for us! On Wednesdays I only have Helaman in the morning and then when he leaves for school I have a few hours to myself - which I use for sleep and homework. So far the schedule seems to be working well.

The first day of school was also the first day of my 5th round of chemotherapy. This round has been the hardest so far. They - the nurses - say that chemo is cumulative and so it does usually get harder the further into that you get. I'm sure that starting school right then was not the best, but that's the way it worked out. I know many people think I am crazy for continuing my education with 6 kids and now having cancer and dealing with the chemo, but it is my thing. Some of my friends scrapbook, some of my friends sew, some read, some play games, some do other things - and my thing is school and learning. I absolutely LOVE it!!!! It is not easy and I think this might be the hardest semester I have had, even though I am carrying a smaller load, but I want to do it and it gives me an escape. I don't have to be a cancer patient at school and I don't have to be a mom there either. I can just be me. I need that break. So, crazy or not, I am taking it!!

So back to this difficult round of chemo...over the Labor Day weekend I was having chest pains so my wonderful Dad took me to get a blood test. We got to Kaiser and the lab said they were closed! I was so upset - I was told they were a 24-hour lab. So, the door was open and my dad and I went in to sit down so that I could rest and we could decide what to do - go home or go to the ER - which I so did not want to do! We sat for maybe 2 minutes and out comes a lady who says, "Can I help you?" I responded with, "I need a blood test, are you really closed?!" Her response, "yeah, but I can do it right now if you want." My dad and I turned to each other and laughed - the Lord was looking out for me and I got my test. My results came back within an hour and all looked okay. The next day I called the nurse and she said that some of my results weren't back so we would wait for those but, in the meantime just rest. The results came back late Tuesday and I was extremely low on magnesium. Apparently they use magnesium to stop muscle contractions - hmmmm I had been having those chest pains - they were caused by that! So Wednesday I went to the doctor and got magnesium. I could walk again - I could breathe again - it was FABULOUS!!!!

Labor Day weekend was fun. We spent Sunday afternoon at my parents' house. My sister and her hubby and her new little baby were here for the weekend and we had a blast visiting with them and holding that precious little girl! On Monday we went over again and the kids got to swim and play with their cousins. I laid on the couch most of the time and we had a fabulous dinner. I wish that I had been feeling better. I could tell that I was worrying my parents and poor David, so I felt bad, but other than that we had a good visit with the family. I miss not getting together so often with them. We used to get together every Sunday, but it just got too full of a house - my parents have 6 kids, 5 in-laws and 20 grandkids. It is a little crowded and LOUD when we all get together, but I sure love it when we do!

As for now, I am doing okay. I am tired much of the time, which leaves David to deal with the kids. My chest has begun to hurt again so I go for another blood test tomorrow. Lately I have felt like a lame Mom to my poor kids. I hate it when they know that I don't feel good they have a look in their eyes that is scared and I can't stand it - especially the girls. It makes me so sad for them. I have been trying to sit with them more, hold them more, hug them more and kiss them more. I love going to school and I have been trying to stay on top of my homework. The house is pretty clean - thanks to my wonderful hubby that works so very hard. Things are good. Life is good and I am going to enjoy it all!!

We are planning to take the kids on day trips over then next few months. My goal is one a month on a Saturday. So look for those updates. Oh yeah! I almost forgot - if you want to see the pictures from our photo shoot in Old Sac go to www.bluelilyphotography.com, click on the "clients" link and when it prompts you for a password you can put in my name "kaci cox" and you can see our amazing family!! (Don't forget the space!)

Enjoy your life while I am enjoying mine! Thanks for checking in!!!!!! Love ya!!!!!!!!!

Somma my cute kiddos

2009-08-31T21:07:00.000-07:00

Tonight we went to a Family Home Evening Ward Activity at the park. For those who don't know Family Home Evening is held every Monday night - it is a highly encouraged activity by our church. We want our families to be strong and helpful. FHE - as we affectionately refer to it- helps us to spend time together and we usually have a gospel lesson, on things such as "love your neighbor," "treat others with respect," "obey your parents," "Jesus loves us," etc.... There are times when we choose to go and have a family activity and maybe forgo the lesson. Tonight was that kind of night. We got together with our Ward Family (again for those who don't know - our church is divided geographically and you go to the building at the time based on where you live. Those who you go to church with at that appointed time are what we refer to as your "Ward Family") at Ashton Park. The kids played on the playground, at yummy make-your-own ice cream sundaes and followed some dogs around while David and I got to relax a little and visit with the adults. It was a really fun activity.Here is a picture of my Vilate - ya know the one that is terrified of dogs! She came up to me and said, "Mom, look what I can do." She was then handed a cute little dog to hold. She was so pleased with herself. Vilate really has come a long, long way. We are so pleased with her!!!

Below is a picture of Nephi. He is posing for the picture and he altered his outfit all on his own. Please notice the Cinderella skirt, the fantastic head flashlight - turned on so that he has red eyes, and he completed the look with Helaman's rainboot - on the wrong feet I might add. Didn't he do a great job? I think maybe he needs to be on one of those designing shows! He's got TALENT!!!! I love these kids!!!!!

The Weeks keep on Flying....

2009-08-29T11:55:00.000-07:00

I thought that the kids starting school would give me and David a chance to breathe. But NO! We have been so busy this past week - at least it feels like we were so busy. As I am sitting here I am trying to recall what all we did.....hmmmm....having a hard time remembering. Here is what I remember:

On Tuesday I started calling around to try to find somewhere to get a hearing test. My hearing is getting so bad and David and I were getting nervous about school starting and my ability to hear and understand the lectures. The first place I called wasn't Kaiser because I had been told that they had cut our Audiology coverage - they told me to call Kaiser and make sure. So, I did. The nice lady at Kaiser told me that I was covered and scheduled me for a hearing test on Wednesday in Roseville (about 25 minutes from my house). So, on Wednesday I went and had my hearing tested. Sure enough I have a moderate hearing loss. It is from the chemo and they expect that it will get worse over the course of my next two treatments but that it might improve following the final treatment. Then the audiologist gave me great news! Hearing aids would be helpful and not only that - they are covered 100%!!!! That is HUGE! Hearing aids run about $1500 - $3000 a piece.

I was able to get a hearing aid appointment for the next day. So, on Thursday I headed back out to Roseville and met with Matt. He showed me the top of the line hearing aids and explained how they work and why they cost so much. They are getting me one for each ear and I get to go and pick them up on Thursday of this next week. I am really excited to be able to understand what everyone is saying again. The great news from Matt was that while I have lost volume, I really haven't lost clarity. Basically that means that once the hearing aids are in, my hearing should be good - not as good as it was before - but good. Some people, when they lose volume also lose clarity, but not me and that is good news.

On Friday I took the morning kids and David and I took Helaman to school and then we headed over to Sac State. Gloria and Nephi had a "meet the teacher" thing and Gloria was SOOOOOO excited! She got to tour her classroom and play with all kinds of things - she was in heaven! Nephi fell asleep in the car and missed meeting his teacher. We then headed over to buy our ridiculously expensive parking pass and then over to the bookstore to buy ridiculously expensive books for me. David is still working on his class schedule and didn't want to purchase the wrong books so he held off. After spending lots of money we took the two little kids and heading to McDonald's so that they could play and we could have some lunch. Then we picked up the boys from school. The girls had gone to a swimming party at a friends. Later in the afternoon I took the 4 kids at home and we went to my parents' house so that they could swim. We picked up the girls on the way home and stopped at Wendy's for dinner (gotta love the dollar menu). The kids watched a movie last night on the Disney Channel and I went to bed! It was an on the go day and I was sure glad it was over!!

This week has flown by. I would love it if things would slow down a bit. I feel like things have been flying for months. Oh well, I guess I will just try to enjoy the ride - even if it is going a bit faster than I think it should. Hope you enjoyed your back to school week (if it started for you this week).

First Day of School

2009-08-29T11:37:00.000-07:00

They were so excited to go to school last Monday. Vilate, Hyrum and Faith started at 8:05 and Helaman started at 11:20. At 7:45 we loaded all the kids into the van and headed over to the school. Being the so "on top of it Mom" that I am, Vilate reminded me: "Mom, I don't even know where my classroom is!" I had not even though about that! We walked the 3 kids into their classrooms and then David, the 3 other kids and I headed over to the MP room for the Back To School Tea. It was fun and the kids had a great time eating a bunch of muffins and then playing hide and go seek with their friends. Here is Nephi counting at the tree. He would just stand at the tree and put his head on it and when HE was ready he would just start looking for the other kids. The best part was that all the other kids hid together in the same spot each time! It was a great kids game of hide and seek!

At 11 we took Helaman to his first day of Kindergarten and he LOVED it!! After school when I asked if he played with certain friends, he replied, "No Mom, I made new friends." Then when I asked what his new friends' names were, he couldn't remember - but this didn't bother him at all. I love 5 year olds!!

The only problem with the day was having to explain to Gloria why her school didn't start until next week. She sure felt left out.

After school the kids reported on their day and were very pleased with their teachers and classmates. That night I was lucky enough to sit and fill out 12 emergency cards (3 per kid). It was so much fun! - Why can't they just make copies??!?!?!?!?! All in all it was a great day!

Week in Review

2009-08-22T19:51:00.000-07:00

It has been another busy week. I started out the week pretty tired from last week's chemo. Sunday I missed church because I was so exhausted and then on top of it all I knew I was getting another bladder infection. So, I spent part - lucky for me and my mom only a small part - of the afternoon in the ER. Stupid Kaiser wouldn't just prescribe me meds over the phone after having a positive urine test. So dumb! Anyways, Monday was spent being tired and laying around and as I recall, Tuesday was similar. Wednesday we drove out to the airport and picked up Grandma Cox (David's Mom) and then we stopped by the school and got the kids teacher assignments. We came home for a while and then spent sometime at Del Norte swimming before Hyrum went to Cub Scouts. Oh yeah - and I had to go back to Kaiser to have a blood test and see where my counts were - I was way too tired and having some weird chest pains that I get when my counts are too low.

Then came Thursday. Thursday was great! Started off the day with another blood test - they wanted to check my counts again and sure enough I had dropped dramatically over night and so the wonderful nurse scheduled me for another transfusion on Friday. Good news: I was going to get an instant pick-me-up; Bad news: I had to wait another day. Oh well!

Around 3:30 we left our house and took the kids and Grandma to Old Sacramento to meet up with Aunt Tami's friend Wendy. Wendy is a photographer from southern California who travels and happened to be in Sacramento on this day and we were lucky enough to get a photo shoot! She is AMAZING. Okay, I haven't seen the pictures yet, but the ideas for shots were fantastic. I have seen other pictures that she has done and they are wonderful. I can't wait to see how our pictures have turned out. We haven't had family pictures done since Gloria was a baby - so it was WAY past time. In case you were wondering, I wore my red wig most of the time and switched to the blonde for the last picture. It was a lot of fun and the kids really liked posing and having pictures taken, although Helaman was a bit of a pill in the beginning, he finally came around thanks to Faith and her offer of Tech Decks! You can check out Wendy's awesome work at www.bluelilyphotography.com.

After the pictures we took the kids and headed to the Back-to-School picnic. It was chaos - ya know hundreds of kids, lots of parents, teachers, food, creek, etc. It was great chaos. We were there for a few hours and the kids got to meet their new teachers, play with their friends and I got to see tons of my friends. All around a good time. We love the picnic and are so glad that we get to visit with everyone before starting school.

Friday we made a decision regarding the move that most of you have heard about. If not, here it is in a nut shell: We had been offered a house at the same rent we currently pay. It is a 4 bedroom, 3 bathroom house with a pool and in a nice neighborhood on a quiet street. Sounds great, huh? And it was a great deal, but after really considering the deal and praying about it, David and I both felt like it is a great deal for someone else. We need to stay where we are at. It is small, but we fit just fine and we love the environment here. We have a great yard - that we don't have to mow - and a playground and wonderful friends and neighbors. So, we are NOT moving. I must admit I was a little disappointed, but in the long run, this will work for the good of my family - I am sure of it. The Lord has never steered me wrong and He has His reasons for us to stay here, so I will make the best of it!

Friday morning I got to take Helaman to his Kindergarten class orientation - basically just a get to know the room and see where you get to come to on Monday. He had a blast. He toured the classroom, played on the playground, saw some of his friends, and even got to play on the computer. Wow! It was really a great morning and I had fun catching up with friends and meeting some new parents.

That afternoon I headed over to Kaiser for my transfusion. It seemed to take forever! I talked to the doctor while I was there regarding my hearing loss. He has determined that it is a side-effect of the chemo (well, duh!) and so they are going to be changing my chemo drugs. I'm glad that he finally is doing something, but now I am a little nervous about a drug change. I am going to contact the doctors that I contacted before for a second opinion and see what they thing about the new drug and go from there.

Right after my transfusion I got to go and see Faith in a play that she has been working on with 40-something other kids for the past 6 weeks. She did fantastic - big surprise! She sang a solo - here comes the bragging - according to the composer of the music, it was the hardest song in the play and Faith did it perfectly! The music was written by the lady who wrote the song, "I'm a Mormon" when I was a kid - some of you will know that song. It was a great play and the kids all did a great job. It is so cool to see your kid on stage being successful! She did great and I am so grateful to Brady, the director, Lisa and Denise, who drove Faith everyday, and all those other parents and kids who worked so hard on pulling this thing together! It was a very enjoyable evening. After the play we dropped Faith at her friend's house for a sleepover and got to go out to Leatherby's for dinner with my parents - HUGE THANKS goes out to Mom Cox for watching the kids through all of this craziness!

And that brings us to today. We didn't do much. Faith had a recording session today followed by a birthday party and the rest of us hung around here and then headed over to Del Norte for an end of summer swim. Mom made us patty melts that were divine and now the kids are all in bed. I am blogging and eating tons of candy - the doctors keep telling me that I have lost too much weight, so I am doing my part to put it back on!

School starts on Monday for the older 4 kids and I am not sure how I feel about that. I am glad that they will have more structure - I'm not so good at structure - and something to do all day and even get to play with their friends, but I am a sad that they will be gone. I am sad that this means for certain that they are another year older. Faith is in 5th grade for goodness sakes. That is only 7 years away from graduation and then BYU. SCARY!!!!! I know that they will enjoy school and I will enjoy the break, but I will miss them.

And a note to all you people out there reading this: LEAVE COMMENTS!!! I love knowing that you read this. I had no idea how many people were peeking into my little corner of the world. I hope that you enjoy what you read, I know I love reading other's blog (so if you have one, TELL ME) and I always learn from others' wonderful examples. Thanks for checking in!!

Another one done

2009-08-15T20:05:00.000-07:00

On Friday I finished my 4th round of chemotherapy. Today is what is commonly known around our house as a "crash day." Basically I just sit on the couch or sleep all day. Sounds fun, huh? It is for about the first 30 minutes and then I have had enough. Thankfully David is awesome on my crash days and I just come and go from the living room as I can.

Guess I should explain a little about crash day. While I am getting the chemo drugs the doctors give me steroids. They give me energy and help me keep up with life. On day 5 of each round of chemo (today) the steroids are stopped and I crash. I get really weak and tired. Standing in the shower, kitchen or even walking down the hall require all my energy. To make dinner I sit on the kitchen chairs, I have a stool in the shower, and I sit down to rest A LOT.

My point in sharing is for journaling - not for sympathy. While there are many yucky things about this cancer, it has made me stop and appreciate the little things. I cuddle with my kids more than I did before. I talk to them more. I am not constantly on the go. It is nice to slow down and take a deep breath and enjoy life. Life seems to constantly being moving and I am glad that I have been forced to take it slower -- not necessarily the way that I have been forced, but I am grateful for the lesson, nonetheless.

This past week has been slow, not much to report. Next week we are pretty busy with back to school stuff. The kids start school in a week. I can't believe that summer is almost over. I know they have mixed feelings, and so do I. Sending them to another year of school means that they are another year older. Faith is starting 5th grade, Hyrum is starting 4th grade, Vilate is starting 2nd grade and my Helaman is starting Kindergarten. CRAZY!!! They are all excited to see their friends and meet their teachers - we won't know who they have until Wednesday.

So, there you have it. We are just hanging in there and enjoying this last week of summer fun. Hope you are all enjoying your end of summer. Thank you all for your thoughts, prayers, love and generosity. We truly are blessed!

Dillon's Beach

2009-08-13T11:11:00.001-07:00

My radiology oncologist gave me an day off of radiation on Friday - so we got to head to the beach house in Dillon's Beach a day early. We got there around dinner time and right after we ate, Grandpa took the kids down to the beach to walk around. We spent the next 2 days on the beach. It was really fun.

Here's my Nephi having a blast with his wheelbarrow in the sand. It was a little chilly on the beach - but Saturday was much better than Friday.

Here's Gloria making sand angels. She loved just playing in the sand and really would have been okay without any water! It was too cold for her - but she did brave the elements on Saturday and went all the way in the ocean. She immediately came to me and said, "I'm all done. Where are my dry clothes." They were at the beach house and she was more than willing to be done for the day if it meant warm, dry clothes!

The kids had a great time jumping the surf. They were trying to body surf, but it was more like scooting. They had a blast and right after this picture I took Nephi with me and Gloria back to the house and the kids had a great time in the water with their Dad. It was a great trip!!

Uncle Jarrod and Aunt Jennifer brought their fire pit (an drum that they pulled out of their old washing machine) and we roasted marshmallows and ate s'mores. The kids LOVED it. It was the best way to spend our last evening there.

The best part for me was just being together. We had almost everyone in the family there. 19 kids, 11 years old down to 6 months old and 10 adults made for a full house. But we missed having Dan, Traci and their newest little one Morgan who is only a little over a month old. I'm sure we could have found somewhere for them to fit!

I really enjoyed staying up late (much too late) and playing cards with the adults. We had a good time and it was nice to visit with everyone. It was a great vacation!!

**If you want to see more pictures, look on Facebook**

A busy week

2009-08-13T11:04:00.000-07:00

I am trying to catch up the blog from the last week or so. We have been busy! We started last week by deciding to move. Wow!! Big decision!! We are really excited and I must say that I am a little overwhelmed by the timeline that we have...but I am sure that it will all work out! We took the kids swimming last week at my parents and we also got to go to the zoo. My little sister came into town for the week and we had a great time at the zoo, seeing all the sleeping animals! Why is it that they are never awake when I am there? I need to get there earlier I guess! Oh well, the kids had fun and we even got a great family picture!I would say that for the picture alone, the trip to the zoo was more than worth it!!

An Exciting FHE

2009-08-04T11:05:00.000-07:00

At our house Monday night is Family Home Evening. Our church encourages families of all shapes and sizes to spend Monday nights as a family discussing gospel principles. So, last night was FHE. We ate dinner and then read the Book of Mormon as a family. We are reading in Nephi and are on the chapters that are similar to the chapters in Isaiah in the Bible. These chapters are difficult to understand and we stop after every verse and try to teach the kids what is being taught. So, it is can be a long and slow process. While we were reading - we were on verse 1 - we heard a lot of noise coming from the girls' bedroom. Nephi and Gloria are encouraged to sit and listen, but we don't make them and they had chosen to go into the girls' room to play. We sent Faith to see what was going on. She came back and reported that Nephi and Gloria had stripped down to their birthday suits and were dancing around the room singing, "I'm naked! I'm naked!" Now we try to teach modesty in our house - ya know, that your body is a gift and you should treasure it and keep it covered. We go in there and there they were in all their glory - David had to leave the room he was laughing so hard and I had to turn around and try to compose myself. It was hilarious!!! I went and got my camera and I would post the funny pictures, but I would hate to be found guilty of child pornography. We had an impromptu lesson on modesty for the little kids and then went back to our scripture reading. All in all it was a successful FHE!

Blood Transfusion

2009-07-31T16:34:00.001-07:00

On Wednesday I went in for my regular radiation appointment and then saw the doctor, which I do every Wednesday. Dr. Chen took one look at me and said that my blood count was low because I was so pale. He told me I needed to go and get a blood test. So, after Gloria's birthday party I went and had my blood tested and it turned out that I was, to quote the nurse, "about a quart low." So, on Thursday the nurse sent me to get "type and cross matched" so that today I could get a blood transfusion. This morning David and I dropped the kids at Sarah's house (THANK YOU!!!) and headed to radiation. After that we went straight to the oncology infusion center and sat there for 3 hours while I got my very first ever blood transfusion. Before I was even done with the first unit of blood (I got 2) my color was better. We are hopeful that this transfusion will keep me out of the hospital this round of chemo.

As for the rest of this week, it has been great. On Monday we took the kids swimming at the club and we ran into some friends and had a good visit. On Tuesday the kids had a primary activity at the church with the youth and I got to go and pick them up. I got to see some of my friends and show off my cool red wig. It was really nice to see them and visit. Wednesday was Gloria's birthday party and it was wonderful to have a good turnout of her friends and their moms. Thursday was low-key and I got a good nap - yay me! Then today after my transfusion David and I went to lunch at Panda Express and now we are just chillin at home. It has been a good week and I am looking forward to next week when my sister is coming to town. Next weekend we are headed to Dillion's beach with the entire Morgan Clan and we are really looking forward to that! So all-in-all another good week. Another week of radiation down and things are going well.

***Just a side note, if you happen to call and I don't answer, it is because it is hard for me to talk on the phone these days. My hearing is getting worse and the phone is really hard to hear and understand people on. Hearing loss is a side effect of chemotherapy and they are not sure yet if it is permanent or just temporary. If you want to get ahold of me the best way is email, I am an email addict and check it multiple times a day - although sometimes it might take me a day or two (or even a week) to respond! My email address is really easy: kacicox@hotmail.com. Feel free to drop me an email anytime! Thanks for all of your love and support!!

Happy 4th Birthday Gloria

2009-07-31T16:01:00.000-07:00

The day after Hyrum's birthday we got to celebrate Gloria's birthday. For her birthday we got her the cutest tea set that she saw back in January and cried when we left the store without it. We also threw her a princess birthday party - after all she is the resident princess here.

Here she is posing with her Hannah Montana pinata! She loved that it was pink and purple and that it was "Hamma Nontana." It didn't hurt that it was full of tons of candy!

She got great presents and was sooo happy to have them. It was really hard to wait for the time to open them. The two that got the biggest response: scissors (who knew?) and the nail kit - see the picture below! She was so thrilled to have her own nail polish! Gloria is such a girly-girl.

Gloria is full of energy and loves to be around her friends. We are constantly asked by her when she gets to go to a friends house and play. Gloria loves to have her hair done, her nails done and change her clothes thousands of times a day. Her favorite colors are purple and pink and she will wear anything in those colors. She loves to put on her dresses and wear sandals. She is my girly-est girl and I love it! Gloria loves to dance and make people laugh. She really enjoys making a mess in her room and letting her big sisters clean it up. There are times when Gloria and Nephi go missing and we seem to always find them in one of the bedrooms, with the door closed and Gloria dictating to Nephi what they are playing. Nephi loves the attention and Gloria loves to be the "big" kid. I love this kid and think she is so funny. She comes up with the craziest stories to tell and laughs at all her not-so-funny jokes. It is fantastic!!!

HaPpY BiRtHdAy GlOrIa!! I LoVe YoU BuNcHeS!!!!

Happy 9th Birthday Hyrum!

2009-07-31T15:44:00.000-07:00

He's 9! Already!! On Monday, the 27th, we celebrated Hyrum's birthday. He actually got lucky and got one of his presents a few weeks early. He has been reading Harry Potter for the last few months. He was really looking forward to seeing the 6th movie and at the last minute I decided that I would take him to the midnight premiere. He was so excited. We went with Grandma and Grandpa Morgan and met Uncle Jarrod and cousins: Eli and Jonah at the theater. Grandpa bet the boys a dollar that they would all fall asleep in the movie, they didn't and all earned a dollar at the end. Hyrum thought the movie was fantastic and loved having the big soda and popcorn as well as all the candy that got passed around. It was really a fun night.

Then on Hyrum's birthday he got a new motor scooter. He has wanted one since Vilate got hers and he was so excited to have his own. He had a great time riding around the apartment complex with Vilate.

We kept with tradition and made Hyrum his own cake - chocolate with purple frosting -

which he promptly shoved his entire face into. There is nothing like being 9!

I am really grateful for Hyrum. He is a good boy. He loves scouts and playing video games. He is enjoying reading Harry Potter - thank you JK Rowling. He loves to play baseball and is an amazing pitcher, he's got the whole stance down - it's really cool to watch him pitch. Hyrum does a great job of keeping his room clean and organized, most of the time and, when he wants to, can be one of the most helpful people that I know. He loves his little brothers and sisters and really likes to hang out with Faith most of all. I am so glad that Hyrum is in our family and I love getting hugs from him. I hope that he enjoyed his birthday!

I LoVe YoU HyRuM - HaPpY BiRtHdAy!!!!!!!!

Nephi golfing

2009-07-25T22:46:00.000-07:00

Here is my funny little boy. I didn't even know he knew what golfing was!

The Best-est Day

2009-07-25T22:26:00.000-07:00

Today was a great day! We started the day doing chores around the house - really exciting, I know. After we finished all the chores we loaded the kids up and headed over to my awesome parents' house to spend the afternoon. The kids had a fabulous time swimming for HOURS!! When we first got there David and I got the kids into their suits and then ditched 'em. We left all the kids there with my parents and headed over to a wig shop. I tried on only 4 wigs and found 2 that are totally opposite of each other but both fantastic! See for yourself:

This one is more conservative and more like my natural hair.

This one is more fun and sassy. I have always wanted to try red hair! What do you think? Which one do you like better??

After we got back to my parents' we did a photo shoot and my kids thought that it was awesome. Then David and got our suits on and David joined the kiddos in the pool. I am such a wimp and thought the water was way cold, so I just sat around the pool and took some fun pictures. It is too hard to upload all of them here so if you want to see more pics of our fun day, go to facebook.com and I will upload them there.

We left their house around 6:30, stopped at Wendy's and loaded up on their Dollar Menu. The kids ate dinner and then went to bed. It was such a fun day and now I am super tired - but it was sooooo worth it! I need more days like this and we will have more over the last few weeks of summer.